How to learn to give obedience with joy and the desire of the heart. Abbess Domnica (Korobeinikova). Conditions for authentic monastic life in the city monastery of Abbess Domnica
On May 19, the Alexander Nevsky Novo-Tikhvin Convent in Yekaterinburg celebrates memorable date- consecration of the main temple of the monastery, the cathedral in honor of the holy noble Grand Duke Alexander Nevsky. Congratulating the abbess of the monastery, Abbess Domnica (Korobeinikova) and the sisters on this holiday, we publish a conversation with Matushka Domnica concerning the most pressing issues of organizing the inner monastic life.
... What is the most important and most difficult thing in obedience to the abbot, who is also called to revive the monastery after many years of desolation? The restoration of churches, the arrangement of the monastic economy - all this, of course, requires great attention, effort, time, prayer - and yet, these works, taken all together, turn out to be easier than a single task - the rebirth of souls.
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– Mother Domnica, there is an opinion that a modern monk is mentally and physically weak: he cannot fast strictly, obey meekly, endure severe or even mild reproof. It turns out that modern monks are no longer ascetics?
– Any monk comes to the monastery out of ardent love for Christ. And where there is love, there is a feat, it cannot be otherwise. Come to any monastery, you will definitely find ascetics there. The very fact that a person for the sake of God left everything and chose a pure life is already a great feat. And I often see, both in our monastery and when I visit other monasteries, how people struggle for the sake of the Lord. How they renounce themselves, how they pray, humble themselves, serve their neighbors… For example, in our church, not far from me, there is a sister who is already over 60, but she never sits down during the service, no matter how long the service lasts. When I look at this sister, I feel that she truly stands before Christ. And in one monastery, I was told about a nun who never said no. Whoever asked her for anything, she served everyone with joy. Everyone loved this sister very much, and when she reposed, the confessor of this monastery said that her soul appeared to the Holy Trinity. Here are just two examples of asceticism, and how many there are in each monastery!
And these are not some exceptional cases. Any monk, no matter how weak he is, strives for achievement. This is the need of his soul - a feat to show the Lord his love. A feat is, one might say, air for his spiritual lungs. Another thing is that the same feats are not suitable for everyone, and it is important for a monk to do everything with the blessing of a spiritual mentor. The abbot or abbess should help each of his children find a feat that is feasible for him. There is no such monk who would not be capable of any feat at all. After all, what does the Gospel command? "Love the Lord with all your strength." Give Christ all your strength - that is, exactly the strength that you have. The Lord judges not according to some absolute standards: they say, you can’t make a thousand prostrations, which means you don’t love God much, but according to the good will, zeal and selflessness of a person. A feat is overcoming oneself in the name of God's love. Suppose it is easy for someone to make three hundred prostrations, while another makes thirty with difficulty, but does them with a burning heart. And these thirty "difficult" prostrations are more precious in the eyes of God than three hundred "easy ones." When a person can do little, but brings to God everything that he has, then the Lord accepts his doing as a great feat, like two blessed mites of the gospel widow.
And regardless of whether we have the strength for bodily feats, any of us can perform an inner feat. What it is? For example, silence for the sake of prayer is a real spiritual austerity. Not to make comments, to accept everyone around them as they are - isn't it a feat? And complacently endure any insults, be friendly and sympathetic when the soul is hard - this can generally be equated with martyrdom! And this feat is higher than many others. In one fatherland, such a story is told. There was a brother in the monastery who labored in silence. One day other fathers decided to test him. They were going to sail together in a boat to a neighboring village, and when everyone went down to the pier, they said to this brother: “The boat is small, there is not enough room for everyone. You are the youngest, take your knapsack and go on foot.” Hearing this, the previously silent brother became indignant and began to argue. Then the fathers said: “There is very bitter wine in his barrel” (that is, his silence is not according to God). The brother understood the denunciation and bowed to the ground. From that time on, he began to force himself to free himself from all self-love, realizing that the feat of patience of insults and injustice is higher than even silence.
– In ancient monasteries, a person who wanted to enter the monastery was tested in various ways. How in our time to check the firmness of will in those who come? How do you, for example, determine whether a newcomer can become a real nun?
– Monasticism is a completely new life. Is a person ready to start as if from scratch, to forget all his past? Is he ready, like the apostles, to give up all his old tricks to follow Christ? This is the main thing that was looked at in ancient monasteries, and the same thing is important now. One ancient patristic tells of a young man who decided to leave for a monastery, and when his friends began to hold him back, he left his clothes in their hands and ran to the monastery. And figuratively speaking, any person who decides to become a monk is called to leave behind the gates of the monastery all his shabby clothes, that is, worldly life.
You ask: how do you know if a person has such a strong determination? We don't have any special tests. Everyday life itself shows whether a newly admitted sister is capable of completely renouncing the world for the sake of a new life in Christ. This can be seen, for example, by the fact that the sister does not like to leave the monastery, does not seek meetings with her relatives, and does not keep anything of her worldly things with her. Nothing should connect a monk with the world, not even any trifle. In ancient monasteries, as the Monk John Cassian the Roman testifies, the applicant was asked: did he leave any little thing or coin with him? At that time, they could not even imagine that a monk would keep something reminiscent of his past life! And today, in well-maintained monasteries, this is treated the same way. Metropolitan Athanasius of Limassol in one conversation recalls how in their monastery on the Holy Mountain, one novice wanted to keep an album with stamps that he had collected since childhood. But the elder said to him: “Throw him into the stove. You left your father and mother, and you can not renounce some brands? Choose: either stamps, or the Holy Mountain. The young man overcame himself, obeyed - and became free. And what would have happened to him if he had retained this little addiction? It could take him back to the world. The heart of a monk should not be divided. In our monastery, from the very beginning, it so happened that the sister did not bring anything with her to the monastery. Of course, at the same time, the monastery gives her everything she needs, so that the sister does not have any worries.
What else is especially important? A monk is a man of prayer. The Monk Anthony the Great, when testing Saint Paul the Simple, looked to see if he was ready to pray with him every night. Paul fulfilled the rule of prayer with vigor, and then Saint Anthony accepted him as a disciple. Even today, the love of prayer remains one of the main conditions for a person to become a monk. If, for example, he is too lazy to come to the service or to fulfill the rule, then what will he do in the monastery? Isn't that why he came to the monastery? Without prayer, the monastic life is absurd.
Of course, in order to pray truly, one must not have any inner concerns, and this is achieved through obedience. In the monastery, all life is built on obedience, and usually in the first few months you can see: is the sister zealous in cutting off her will? does he obey with freedom? Doesn't he inwardly stick to his own opinion?
Finally, some more time passes when it becomes clear whether the sister remains firm in the temptations that are inevitable in the spiritual life; does she have the patience and sacrificial spirit to be at peace with all the sisters; whether she is ready to bear the burdens of her neighbors. The sister acquires the habit of prayer, reading, and monastic work. She merges with sisterhood, cannot imagine herself without it. In short, the sister lives in a monastery and enjoys the monastic life. Here is the nun. And her tonsure is both for her and for us the most joyful and desirable event.
– People with very different abilities and talents, both external and spiritual, gather in the monastery. And in such a close circle, all this is in plain sight. How to avoid rivalry, envy?
– In monasticism, a person can discover in himself the main talent – the ability to communicate with God, to receive the Holy Spirit. All other gifts are secondary. One of the holy fathers says: will a man who is dressed in royal purple envy the rags of a beggar? Spiritual life is the royal purple, and earthly talents and advantages are like the rags of a beggar. And in the monastery everyone can dress in purple, feel like a royal son! What is needed for this? First of all, a deep prayerful and liturgical life. Everyone is equal at the Liturgy. There are no young and old, talented and mediocre, educated and simple. We all stand before Christ equally, and worship sanctifies all.
At the very beginning of the foundation of our monastery, in the 19th century, even when it was just a monastic community, without a clergy, the sisters read the services themselves every day, in the prayer room. And such grace reigned at these services that all the surrounding residents came to pray with the sisters and were ready to endure both crowding and all inconveniences. Worship was the main source of joy and inspiration! And for us now worship is the foundation of life. One of our sisters said that when she came to the monastery as a pilgrim, the first thing that struck her was the services. She was surprised: how many sisters, and they all stand as one person - like some kind of heavenly army, the army of Christ! In this unity, she saw such beauty, such strength, that she also wanted to be in this heavenly face. Worship unites us all with strong bonds.
There is another condition in monastic life due to which there is no spirit of rivalry and envy in the monastery. This is a private prayer. She gives the sisters such a sense of fullness of life that they no longer need any earthly success. Thanks to prayer in the monastery, there are other values, a different view of everything. We can say that, coming to the monastery, a person moves to a different coordinate system. For example, one sister, looking at another, does not evaluate her appearance, talents, position. All this loses its meaning for a person who prays, whose inner gaze is constantly turned to God. He sees everything and everyone in God. And we see in each other, first of all, sisters in Christ, with whom we stand before God together.
Of course, sometimes there are difficulties. When someone succumbs to negligence in spiritual work and begins to pay attention to the external, then a feeling of envy enters his heart. For example, a sister begins to be upset why the Lord did not give her a beautiful voice, like others. And instead of living and rejoicing, she thinks about singing all day long, worries. Such a sister needs to be helped to re-establish the right spiritual guidelines for herself. So that she understands that happiness is not in singing beautifully, but in being with God. And that God gives her everything for joy, she only needs to leave her will and surrender into His hands. Elder Paisios Svyatogorets said to one nun: “You have so much spiritual strength, and you squander it on stupid envy! You have an inborn nobility, and you suffer like the last beggar. If you hadn’t stalled in envy, you would have been very successful in your spiritual life, in prayer.” When you open other, spiritual perspectives for a person, then he gradually gets rid of envy and finds peace and joy.
– What should be the attitude towards work in the monastery? The holy fathers say that, on the one hand, a monk must do his work zealously, and on the other, impartially. How can this be combined?
– If a monk leads a deep spiritual life, loves prayer, then he has the right attitude towards work. For him, work is a spiritual activity through which he unites with God. Once upon a time, Adam cultivated paradise according to the commandment of God, and through this work he grew in the knowledge of God. It is now difficult for people to understand this secret, because they are accustomed to looking at work only as a means for acquiring some earthly goods. But in the monastery this secret is revealed to man. Because a monk does not just work, he fulfills a commandment, he does obedience. And as one elder says, a monk's hands should tremble when he touches his work! And if he works collectedly, selflessly, diligently, then he, like Adam in Paradise, feels that the Lord is near him. There is an interesting story in one book. There was a monastery in which the brethren were very fond of singing at services. And they entrusted the service in the kitchen to one simple brother, who could not sing. He served them as saints who sing of God, but he himself was very fond of listening to the service, and therefore, at the first opportunity, he ran to the doors of the temple to listen to how they sing. One of the brothers, wanting to tease the cook, hid the ladle with which he stirred the food. So, the brother listened to the chants for a while and ran to the kitchen to mix the food. Not finding a ladle, he stirred the boiling food with his hand and, without getting burned at all, again ran to listen to the singing. Then the brothers realized that God was more likely to be with this brother in the kitchen than where they all sang. Zealous service to others brings the monk the grace of God.
And by the way, from how a person works, you can see how he prays. I remember how in one film His Holiness Patriarch Kirill spoke about Metropolitan Nikodim (Rotov): “He served the Liturgy so ardently – how could he not serve the Church with the same ardor and zeal after that?” So is a monk who prays earnestly – can he then work coolly, carelessly?
At the same time, of course, it is very important to do everything with blessing and not give your heart to your work. Elder Paisios advised: “As much as you can, do not devote your heart to the work. Hands, mind - give, but do not give your heart. With such a dispensation, a monk is internally free, he has a peaceful and cheerful spirit, although at the same time he may be working hard and hard. This is very important point! After all, if a monk, because of his addiction to obedience, loses peace of mind and conflicts with his neighbors, then this is destructive both for himself and for the brotherhood. On the one hand, a monk, of course, must perform any task carefully. But still, the most important thing for him in any business is to acquire spiritual fruit, that is, to humble himself, to obey, to keep peace with his neighbors and peace in his own heart. It is this spiritual fruit that will remain in eternity, while all earthly affairs will pass away. And in fact, the monk brings the monastery the most benefit not with his earthly talents, but with the fact that he humbles himself, cuts off his will, and selflessly serves his neighbor. This is the greatest benefit for the monastery.
—Tell me, what are the difficulties in prayer? What advice do you have for sisters in such cases?
“I think there are two main temptations. Firstly, the devil entices the monk with various things so that in the evening he comes to his cell as late as possible and prays as little as possible. One elder said to his novices: “At the hour of your prayer, the devil will bring you a hundred thousand unfinished deeds as a keepsake, if only you would spin like a squirrel in a wheel.” And, unfortunately, it is very easy for him to tempt the monks in this way. Take any monk - he has nothing to do! And the evil one takes advantage of this: the closer the evening comes, the more he inspires the monk with thoughts, worries about business ... some personal affairs, from unnecessary conversations, to calculate their affairs during the day in such a way as to finish before the evening. But she did not regret that she withstood this struggle and accustomed herself to the rule. She felt that the rule is, in the truest sense of the word, the food of a monk. Imagine that a person does not eat. What happens then? He becomes sick, weak, sad. Similarly, a monk, when he does not follow the rule, is spiritually exhausted, so that he feels neither inspiration nor love for God. He looks around and sees everyday life, he doesn’t feel like praying, his thoughts are full of condemnation ... The confessor of our father, father Abraham, hegumen Andrei (Mashkov), a tonsurer of the Glinskaya Hermitage, very often said: “Prayer is salt. If meat or fish is not salted, they will rot. So a person, if he does not pray, begins to rot.”
Often monks underestimate their stay in a cell, and this is one of the highest feats. In the cell, the monk labors in repentance, sobriety, the memory of death. Even the renunciation of the world is truly accomplished precisely in the cell - when, during prayer, the monk renounces all worldly thoughts. This is a feat that especially transforms a person. And one of the greatest achievements for a monk is to accustom himself to make the rule at the same time every day.
The second temptation, which probably all monks also face, is insensitivity in prayer. What to do in this case? I like the advice of St. John Cassian the Roman the most. He advises the monk, like the Old Testament warrior Aod, to use both hands as the right one - that is, to use both happiness and misfortune for one's own good. Are you doing well in prayer, is there tenderness, a feeling of closeness to God? Fine, but don't give in to the temptation of the "right," that is, vanity, and you won't be left without fruit. But even when temptation comes from the "left", prayer seems boring, and the very stay in the cell is painful - do not lose heart and do not stop praying. And you will receive a crown for your patience and faithfulness to God. The main thing is not to leave prayer. Elder Ephraim of Philotheus advised his monks, when they had difficulties in prayer, to deceive themselves a little. He told them: “Come to your cell and say to yourself: “I will stretch out one rosary, it is fast.” Then say: “I extended one, I will extend the other. I will stretch out the third one, to the glory of the Holy Trinity. I will stretch out the fourth one, to the glory of the four evangelists.” So you won’t notice how you make your rule. ”
A monk who patiently endures difficulties in prayer and does not leave it, even if he has no feelings for years, is a martyr in the eyes of God. Prayer is never wasted, and a person loses nothing when he labors in it. He will surely receive a reward from God.
– The disease of our century is despondency, relaxation of the soul. How do you recommend that sisters fight against the thoughts of discouragement?
– Elder Sophronius (Sakharov) wrote that in the era when Einstein made his great discovery, humanity plunged into deep despair. That is, at the same time, the human mind reached its highest development and revealed its complete impotence. The greatest discoveries, the most developed intellect - this is not a guarantee of happiness. On the contrary, they can even lead to degradation and destruction. And, as Elder Sophronius notes, in the same era, the Monk Silouan received a revelation from the Lord: “Keep your mind in hell - and do not despair.” This consoling word: "Do not despair" - through the elder Siluan was spoken by the Lord to all modern people. The cure for despair is humility and hope in God.
For the hegumen of the monastery, one of the most important things is to maintain a cheerful spirit in the brotherhood, so that there is not even a trace of despondency. This is the key to a correct spiritual life. One ancient ascetic, Abba Apollos, noticing one of the brothers sad, always called him to him, asked him and then encouraged him: “Why are you sad? Is it proper for a monk to be discouraged? Let sinners and pagans weep, but joy is fitting for us.” Indeed, although a monk follows a narrow path, at the same time, great grace is secretly present in the monastic life. The Lord especially supports and comforts the monks. And whatever the causes of despondency, they can always be overcome. For example, sometimes despondency comes from some embarrassing thought: the devil presents something to the monk in a black light. Then one confidential conversation between a monk and a spiritual father is enough to completely dispel despondency. It may also be that a person is overworked, and this is usually accompanied by depression of the soul, gloomy thoughts. You advise such a person to just sleep, take a walk - and you look: he is already cheerful again, and cannot even remember why he was discouraged. It also happens that a person becomes discouraged because he has sinned. Being discouraged by sin is a more dangerous thing than even sin itself. This can be compared to an arrow with poison on its tip. The arrow is sin, and the poison is despondency. And when a person is wounded by sin, the most important thing for him is not to lose heart, not to let the poison of despondency poison his whole being. Saint Ignatius (Bryanchaninov) on such occasions would say to his novices: “Confess your sin and be cheerful!”
What else can cause depression? The fact that a person has not completely renounced the world. He keeps some kind of affection in his heart, he wants something worldly - and therefore his soul is divided and longing. But if he frankly and repentantly confesses this, he can very quickly be healed of sadness. Despondency sometimes arises because a person aspires to lofty virtues that are not yet available to him. The most common example: a monk read about blessed states, got inspired, followed the rule - but, as it seems to him, there is no grace. And now he is upset, he prays already without inspiration, he has a darkness of thoughts. But in fact, the very fact that he has risen to the rule, says a prayer - this is already an act of the grace of God. And if a monk simply loves his rule, fulfills it with diligence, then he will advance in spiritual life.
Despondency makes a monk powerless. Whereas hope in God helps him overcome all difficulties. Even if a monk has fallen into negligence, this is no reason to indulge in despondency. At any moment, a monk can say to himself, like the prodigal son: “I will get up and go to my Father. I will make my rule, I will read the Gospel.” And his life will change, he will again embark on the path leading to God.
– One of the most difficult questions: how to keep jealousy for God throughout the monastery and in the heart of every sister? A monk has no right to be negligent, he must burn in spirit! In the first centuries, all Christians were ardent in spirit, so that they were ready to give everything to Christ, up to their own lives. And when the spiritual cooling began, it was the monks who kept the fiery spirit and zeal for God in their hearts. The monk is a modern hero of the spirit, a fighter, always ready to fight. If he loses his zeal and avoids the shedding of blood for the sake of the commandments of Christ, then for him this is a return back to worldly life. On the Holy Mountain in our days there was one ascetic, the monk Arseny; at the beginning of his monastic path, he fell into negligence, left prayer, asceticism, and, as he himself said, became a layman in monastic clothes. One day he was on a boat in a storm and began to sink. Death was inevitable, and he began to call on the Mother of God: “Save me, I will change my life, I will strive for the Lord!” The Blessed Virgin Mary saved him - and after that he became a different person. This is how we must constantly pray to the Lord and the Mother of God to help us keep jealousy in our hearts. Only the monk who strives, burns in spirit, lives the true life in Christ. Whatever he does, be it work or prayer, he does everything with inspiration. With special determination, he cuts off his will, humbles himself, sacrifices himself. And his zeal for God kindles the hearts of those around him. As Elder Paisius said, being next to a true monk is more beneficial than even reading the lives of the saints.
Jealousy is something that we need to renew in ourselves every day. Every day we are called, as it were, to start our lives anew, to wake up in the morning and rejoice: today I will please Christ, I will deny myself, serve my neighbor, and pray. Today I start my journey to God! In earthly life it cannot be such that a person once stops striving, so that he once says: “I have achieved everything, I can do nothing more.” Man is called to seek God again and again. The search for God is the attainment of Him.
Quick reference:
The Novo-Tikhvin Convent in Yekaterinburg was founded in 1809 by a personal decree of Emperor Alexander I. The first abbess was Abbess Taisia (Kostromina), who arranged the life of the monastery in accordance with ancient monastic traditions, consulting with spiritually experienced elders: Abbot Isaiah (Zubkov), rector of Sarovskaya desert and the confessor of St. Seraphim, St. Philaret Glinsky, St. Zosima (Verkhovsky). Strict social rules, daily worship, love of prayer, strong unity between the sisters - these principles, laid down by Abbess Taisia, were kept by all subsequent abbesses. The main shrine of the monastery was the Tikhvin Icon of the Most Holy Theotokos, on the feast in whose honor, on June 26/July 9, the whole of Yekaterinburg and many pilgrims from all over the province gathered. After the revolution, the monastery was closed, the sisters had to lead a monastic life in the world, many were subjected to repression.
In 1994, the revival of the monastery began; Schema-Archimandrite Abraham (Reidman) has been the spiritual father of the monastery all these years. To date, the main temple of the monastery, the Cathedral of St. Alexander Nevsky.
The cathedral was founded under the first abbess, Abbess Taisia. The sisters helped in the construction of the temple, for which they arranged a small brick factory, they made bricks with their own hands and brought them to the temple under construction. The Cathedral of the Three Altars was consecrated in 1854.
In 1905, during a trip to the Urals, St. rights. John of Kronstadt: during this divine service, the worshipers even stood on the windowsills and on the cornices of the windows outside.
After the revolution, the cathedral was closed, since the 1960s it housed a museum of local lore, and the relics of St. rights. Simeon of Verkhotursky - for storage in a closed department. There they remained until the return of their Church in 1989.
In 1991, the temple was returned to believers, and then transferred to the revived Novo-Tikhvin Monastery. The sisters worked hard on the restoration of the cathedral, with great love and diligence: the whole appearance of the temple was designed in detail by them according to ancient models.
During the consecration of the cathedral by His Holiness Patriarch Kirill of Moscow and All Russia on May 19, 2013, they were given a blessing so that the monastery would henceforth be called: Alexander Nevsky Novo-Tikhvinsky.
Today, at the beginning of the conversation, I want to think with you a little about one gift that each of us has. Saint Ignatius and other holy fathers call it one of the greatest gifts of God. This gift distinguishes man from all other earthly creatures, makes him the crown of creation and likens him to God Himself.
And maybe someone has already understood that I'm talking about the gift of the word.
It is not given to us by chance. We received it in order to proclaim God with our word.
And, of course, we can proclaim about Him not only with a direct sermon, but in general with any word spoken in the gospel spirit: in the spirit of meekness, humility, love.
Unfortunately, we sometimes use this gift incorrectly, and instead of proclaiming the word about God, we proclaim about the passions, about sin. How does this happen?
Here, for example, we have an urgent departure, and the sister, who is supposed to travel with us, is delayed for some reason. And when she comes, we reproach her. So we announced our passions, our impatience. Or another example: we went to someone else's obedience to ask for some thing and in passing made a remark about the mess. And instead of pleasing our neighbors, we wounded their souls.
And today I would like to call on all of us to convey only love with our words, proclaim only about God. After all, this is a real virtue - never to say unpleasant words to your neighbors. And I would like this virtue to become our second nature.
Kindness - just a rule of decency?
It may seem to someone that benevolence is only an external virtue, just a rule of decency. But in reality it is intimately connected with our inner life. As far as we know how to follow our speech, we succeed spiritually.
And now let's talk in more detail about why this virtue is so important.
Firstly, we must be able to restrain ourselves, not to express everything that is in our heart at once. Restraint in speech is a sign of a collected person, a person who constantly watches over himself and struggles with his passions.
As writes Abba Isaiah, “The abstinence of the tongue proves that a person is a true ascetic. An unbridled tongue is a sign of a person who is alien to virtue.
Even among people who are far from the Church, there is an idea that a decent, educated person is the one who strictly monitors his speech. For example, a well-known Russian writer said: "I used to restrain myself, because it is not befitting for a decent person to dismiss himself."
And, of course, what is indecent for a secular person is even more unsuitable for a monk. One old man says this about it: “I can't hold my tongue - that shows how messed up my mind is. I can not cut off the anger, irritability, argumentativeness. As soon as they say a word to me, something immediately jumps out of me. Lightning doesn't shoot out of a cloud as fast as the answer comes out of my mouth. And if it comes out of the mouth, how much more - out of a thought!
And so we can judge our inner state. If rude words fly out of our mouths faster than lightning, this is an alarming signal. This means that we have lost our sobriety, we have lost our repentant attitude, we have ceased to struggle with our thoughts. After all, whoever follows his thoughts, he even more so follows his words.
There is also feedback. He who strictly controls his speech will soon learn to control his thoughts. Keeping the mouth is one of the strongest weapons in the fight against passions.
Victory over anger
The habit of monitoring one's speech is one of the foundations of our spiritual life. After all, it is no coincidence that the holy fathers call insolence the mother of all passions, the destroyer of virtues. What is audacity? This is intemperance in speech, when a person says whatever he wants.
Here is how he writes about it Elder Emilian: “Everything that we just think and then calmly blurt out is all insolence. Insolence is shamelessness, it is a preference for one's "I" everywhere and always. So, choose: either Christ, or yourself. You cannot, if you have audacity, be the son of God. If you dare, then your life will be unsuccessful, frustrated, your whole life will become sluggish, you will experience decrepitude, dryness of the heart.
And, on the contrary, when we are kept from insolence, then our heart comes to life, becomes capable of virtue. The more strictly we guard our lips, the stronger we are in the struggle against passions. And with the help of silence and prayer, we can overcome any, even the most gross passions, for example, the passion of anger.
One ancient ascetic, Abba Iperchiy, said that "A person who does not hold his tongue during anger will not be able to hold on to passion itself." And it can also be said vice versa: whoever tries to hold his tongue in anger and at the same time prays earnestly, he will certainly overcome this passion.
Many of you have read the biography of the elder Joseph Hesychast and, probably, you remember that in his youth he was extremely angry, not a day passed that he did not quarrel with someone. As he himself said, he was able to kill a man in anger. In the monastery, he fiercely struggled with this passion. Once with him there was such a case.
He lived on Katunaki with Elder Ephraim, and one day a monk from a neighboring kaliva began to vilify Father Ephraim in every possible way because of the border that passed between their kaliva. Elder Ephraim, due to his meekness and gentleness, did not answer anything, and Francis (that was the name of Father Joseph at that time) immediately flared up with anger: his heart began to beat furiously, his blood boiled in his veins, and his head became dim with rage. He wanted to run out of the kaliva to scold this man, but instead he rushed to the temple.
Spread out there on the floor, shedding tears, he began to pray Holy Mother of God: "Help me! Help me now, Holy Virgin! My Christ, save me! Help me, save me, tame the passion." Gradually, Francis calmed down and came to his senses. He felt that passion subsided and peace reigned in his heart.
Then he came out of the kaliva and meekly said to the offender: “Eh, yes, this is not worth such an effort. We did not come here to inherit kalyvas, olive trees and rocks. We came here for the sake of our soul, for the sake of love. If we lose love, we lose God. Well, Geronda, we left our parents, we left so many things, and now we will scold because of this, we will become a laughingstock for “angels and men” and for every creature?
Later Elder Joseph confessed: “It was my first win at the beginning of the field. Since then, I felt that anger and irritation no longer acted in me with such tension. Meekness began to caress my heart. And as we know, over time, Father Joseph acquired extraordinary meekness and love.
So we can overcome anger and many other passions, simply by forcing ourselves to silence and prayer. And for this we do not need to wait for an opportunity when we will be vilified, as Elder Joseph was vilified. With us, most likely, this will not happen.
But if in any petty situation, when our neighbor annoys us with something, we are silent and try to drive the annoyance out of our souls with prayer - this is already a feat that purifies our heart.
When it's just hard...
Something similar to what happened to one novice, about whom he tells Elder Silouan. This novice was addressed with a simple request, but he was ill, suffering physically and mentally, and inadvertently words of annoyance escaped from him.
Here's how it happened: “We had a novice in the monastery who fell from a tree while picking olives, and his legs were taken away. When he was in the hospital in the Preobrazhensky building, the monk who lay next to him, on the next bed, died. The minister began to prepare the body of the deceased for burial, and asked the sick novice to hold the needle. The patient replied: “Why are you bothering me?” But after this word, his soul became unpeaceful, and then he called the confessor and confessed to him his sin of disobedience. The wise will understand why the soul of a monk has become unpeaceful, and the unwise will say that this is nothing.”
Such situations happen often in our life. We are asked for something when we are sick or upset. And so, by saying just a few words, we can lose peace and prayer. And, on the contrary, by refraining from the word of contradiction, we will accomplish a small feat that will bring grace into our soul.
And I want to repeat that our whole life can consist of such small feats. From the outside, it may seem that we are not doing anything special and outwardly striving no more than others. Meanwhile, we conquer passions and succeed day by day.
Our speech is like a mirror
There is another regularity in our spiritual life. A person striving in prayer cannot be rough with his neighbors.
He said that if you are rude in relations with people, then this is alarming. This is a sign that something is wrong in your spiritual life.
Indeed, real prayer ennobles a person, softens, thins his heart. When a person prays, he begins to subtly feel the souls of other people.
He becomes careful and takes care of himself so as not to upset his neighbors even with one look, or one gesture, and even more so with a word.
With regard to words, he is especially sober, because the word has an incomparable power. A word can both comfort, and encourage, and elevate, and at the same time push away and injure the soul of another person. In one pre-revolutionary book on etiquette, there is such an accurate observation: "Rough speeches and harsh words attract ill-wishers more and kill a good disposition more often than bad deeds."
The word is a sharp knife
And, probably, each of you knows for yourself that the pain caused by a harsh word can live in the soul for a very long time. It is no coincidence that there is such an expression: "The word is like a sharp knife." And the sin that we commit when we hurt our neighbor with a word is very serious. Moreover, we are not justified by the fact that, for example, we were in a difficult spiritual state, or that our neighbor, whom we offended, behaved badly.
Elder Emilian writes about it like this: "Think how much we talk to each other hurtful words! And we will find all our words above, in heaven. As a rule, when we say something unpleasant to our neighbors, we justify ourselves: “Yes, he insulted me, he is a shame to the whole monastery!” Or: “Yes, he does not hear, does not understand, does not want!” However, did you get a word out? You will not return it, even if you shed rivers of tears. Did you say to your brother: “Oh, how stupid are you”? It's over. Shed blood, put your head under the ax - and your word will remain.
That is why the fathers say: let there be passions within us, let there be even not one legion, but many legions of demons, throwing us to the ground and making us froth, nothing. The word we say to our neighbor is worse. Legions of demons are instantly cast out by Christ and thrown from the steep into the Sea of Gadarene. But the word that we say, He cannot correct. The word becomes a bird and flies wherever it wants. It scatters your sin everywhere and reveals it to all the saints and all the angels, and you will find it there in heaven.”
One might ask, “But is the word really not forgiven? After all, any sin that we repented of is forgiven.” Yes, of course, we always repent of a sin in a word, as in any other. But a wound still remains in the soul of a neighbor - and we can do nothing about it. For example, we said an unpleasant word to someone, offended a person. And now we have repented for a long time, but the person is suffering.
And this is not enough. In frustration, he went and also offended someone, maybe not just one person, but several. And some of these people in turn hurt others. Finally, a big quarrel breaks out somewhere. And now we seem to have nothing to do with this quarrel, but the root cause was an unpleasant word that we said. And therefore all these wounded souls are on our conscience.
The chain of grievances and quarrels can be endless. And then, at the Last Judgment, we will meet all the people who suffered through our fault. Yes, it is possible to repent in the word - but imagine what our repentance must be in order to blot out such a grave sin!
And therefore, let us remember: no matter what person we have to communicate with, even if he has a very difficult character, even if he hurts us, we still have no right to hurt him with a word. We do not know what consequences this may have - up to the death of the soul of this person.
How to make good people evil and evil people good
And by the way, it has been noticed: if we speak unpleasant words to our neighbors, then we see everyone around us as sinners. When we begin to take care of ourselves, do not allow ourselves to upset anyone even with a single word, then we suddenly find that there are only angels around us, kind, meek, loving us.
Why did it happen? Of course, because our neighbors have responded to our kindness, their hearts have been opened to us. As writes Saint Macarius the Great, “A proud and evil word makes good people evil, but a good and humble word turns evil people to good.” At the same time, when we try not to offend anyone, we ourselves soften, acquire a kind, non-judgmental look.
Let me tell you a wise story. An old man was sitting at the gates of a certain city. Once a stranger came to the gate and asked him: “What kind of people live in this city?” He answered with a question: “And what kind of people lived where you came from?” “Oh, they were terrible people! Evil, grumpy, it was impossible to get along with them! Then the elder said: “In this city you will meet exactly the same.” The Stranger shook his head and moved on.
Soon another wanderer appeared at the gate and also turned to the elder with the question: “What kind of people live here?” And just like the first one, he asked him: “And what kind of people lived there, where did you come from?” - "Beautiful people! Kind, friendly, hospitable." “And here you will see them.” And the stranger gladly entered the city.
Then the elder was asked: “Which of them did you tell the truth, and whom did you deceive?” He replied: “I told the truth to both. Each person has his own special world inside and he carries it with him wherever he goes.
And we create the world around ourselves with our own words. If our words are kind, then the world around us becomes kinder. And of course, the words we speak affect not only our relationships with others, but also our inner life, our prayer.
Said a rude word - there will be no prayer
Those who read diaries Righteous John of Kronstadt, can recall many cases when he was unrestrained in words, offended his neighbors and after that felt the abandonment of grace. Let's read one of these cases:
“A sudden spiritual storm happened to me at home from my impatience, pride, self-will and anger: I was offended that my wife, this earthly guardian angel, stopped me several times at the entrance and exit from the apartment with the words: “Hush, hush ... Rufina sleeping."
I should have respected her warning, honored her compassionate love for the child, but I was jealous that she was taking care of the baby and not taking care of me, who was working unceasingly, and shouted at her with my heart, and stamped my foot, and spoke with bitterness and pity different hurtful words.
Oh, how I fell morally, how I was embarrassed and upset in spirit! - and this is before dinner. A long repentance and tears and repeated falling to the throne of the merciful Lord cost me the forgiveness of sins, restoration to a peaceful state and renewal. Half the liturgy I wept before the Lord, repenting of my sins, of my madness, of my wordless fury.
The Lord looked down on my tears, on my sincere, ardent repentance, and forgave me my guilt, took away my heartache and gave me peace and consolation. This was the true resurrection from the dead. I glorify the mercy of God, his infinite patience towards me, a sinner. What a lesson for me for the future: do not get irritated, do not become embittered, do not be wayward, curb your passions!
And I want to give another example, from life Elder Arseny Cave: “One day he said to his brethren the following lesson:
“To the best of your ability, see to it that all the brethren are pleased with you. If in kinovia you have a good relationship with ninety-nine brethren, and you upset one brother through inattention, then he becomes an obstacle in your prayer. One day a brother bowed before me and said:
— Bless, Geronda. I grieved one brother, and therefore the prayer does not go.
I answer him:
- Well, that's okay. Lay a bow before your brother so that love comes, and prayer will return again.
- Geronda, but I bowed before you, isn't that enough?
“But no,” I tell him, “not enough. What you did wrong before him, for that you will ask for forgiveness.
I saw the struggle going on inside him. Finally he went and asked for forgiveness. The next day he comes again and says to me:
— Thank you, Geronda, for your advice. All last night I prayed with joy and tenderness.”
And every person who struggles in prayer feels how much his prayer depends on what and how he says to his neighbors. He said a rude word, offended his neighbor - there will be no prayer. And a true ascetic refrains not only from obvious rudeness, but also from speaking coldly, dryly, with indifference.
When the truth becomes a lie
Besides, one of the important skills for us is to express our opinion with tact and caution. I will talk about this in more detail. Sometimes we express our opinion without thinking at all. We think: what is there to think about? After all, we are telling the truth. But from the point of view of the Gospel, our truth may turn out to be a lie.
If we grieve our neighbor with our words, can we really call it true? The gospel truth does not consist at all in saying something corresponding to reality, but in never offending anyone.
And I would like to give one example - from the life of the writer Anton Chekhov. Contemporaries knew him as a very soft, delicate person; in his communication with people, he strictly adhered to one rule - not to upset anyone. Once a lady came to him with the manuscript of her novel. She was extremely insistent, almost importunate.
And Chekhov at that time was mortally ill with tuberculosis, it was already difficult for him to walk, talk and even just breathe. And so he sat with this lady for about two hours, reading and correcting a completely mediocre work, and never once showed even the slightest displeasure.
In such cases, Chekhov admitted that he was always sorry to answer with a sharp refusal, a negative assessment, "to stun with a cold and harsh word," as he put it. And as contemporaries testify, people loved to communicate with Chekhov, were drawn to him, he had many sincere friends.
And it happens that a person seems to have many virtues, intelligence, some special talent, wit, but for some reason others avoid communicating with him. And the thing is that he is used to categorically expressing his opinion, without thinking about the feelings of other people. Communication with him does not give pleasure, because with his words he constantly wounds the souls of his neighbors. Even if his remarks are completely justified, fair and reasonable, one does not want to agree with them, because harsh words hurt the heart.
At Elder Emilian There is one clear observation: “The one who insists on his will, knowledge, opinion, gets enmity, no one loves him. Everyone, as if possessed, awakens against such a person the instinct of opposition, the desire to say to him: NO! Of course, he sees the reason in his neighbors. But he himself is to blame and deserves such a share, he lays such a bedding for himself.
Someone may experience some embarrassment: “It happens that it is necessary to insist on one’s opinion for the good of the cause. How to be in this case? But in fact, perseverance and categoricalness just do little good, and often even harm the cause. You have probably noticed this yourself.
For example, we say to subordinates: “Why, this is no good! I assure you, it all needs to be redone from start to finish. No, no, it's impossible to fix! We need to completely redo it!"
If we say so, then we can be almost sure that the result of the case will not be very good. The neighbors whom we offended with our tone simply will not find the strength and zeal to do this job well. Victory by force is an unrighteous victory; it never bears good fruit.
And the more we insist, demand, put pressure on others, the less successfully our affairs go. After all, the main thing that is needed for the success of a business is an atmosphere of peace, love, and trust. When we communicate with our neighbors in this spirit, then they willingly obey us and help us with special joy.
"Delight the lives of your neighbors, and God will delight yours"
And finally, I would like to remind you of one more rule of our communication with our neighbors. He says about him: "Be kind in your fellowship and sweet in your speech." It is not enough only to abstain from evil words, but one must also squander good. And when we speak with our neighbors, let there always be warm, friendly, comforting words on our lips. As one old man writes, “when you talk, let your face be smiling, joyful, let sweetness flow from your lips, honey flow.”
At Saint Ephraim the Syrian there are similar words: “As honey and honeycomb in the mouth, the answer of a brother to his neighbor, given with love. Like cold water in the heat for a thirsty one, a word of comfort to a brother in sorrow.
Friendliness, cordiality in communication can be called a sign of a true ascetic. And I would like to give one small example.
St. Athanasius the Great, who compiled the life of St. Anthony the Great, vividly describes the character of this great saint of God.
The Monk Anthony led a strict life, fought daily with demons, did not see a human face for half a year, but when he returned to people, as Saint Athanasius writes, “He was pleasant and courteous. His word was seasoned with Divine salt. Therefore, there was no such person who would not love Saint Anthony. No one hated him, did not envy him, but everyone rejoiced and ran to him.
We will not only be restrained and polite, but we will be pleasant, friendly, loving. Let us season every word of ours with “Divine Salt”—that is, with love, tenderness, and joy. And we will feel how the wise words spoken by Saint John of Kronstadt: “Delight the lives of your neighbors, and God will delight yours. With a word that comes from a believing and loving heart, we can create miracles of life for our souls and for the souls of others.
We build with the word when we try to pronounce only those words that are pleasing to God – and He is pleased with any word spoken with gospel feeling. Even when we make some simple, everyday request, but with love, with warmth, this already brings us closer to God. We ourselves feel God, and the people around us also feel His presence.
And so we build our unity, our common life in Christ. Of course, this is not easy. Evangelical fellowship is higher than our nature, which is in a state of fall, and therefore it often requires a podvig.
Elder Sophronius in his conversations tells one incident: once a certain French lady said to him: “I can’t imagine how people become saints. Because it's so hard! You have to be polite to everyone, but there are so many unpleasant people around!”
And remembering these words Elder Sophronius remarks: “Of course, holiness is not only politeness. But in fact, it is not easy to communicate with people. And in our small monastic environment there are moments when a brother or sister becomes difficult for us. And how to be polite to them? But everything is overcome by prayer, and if with the help of prayer we learn this difficult task – to love each other – then the Lord is with us.”
Where the commandment is fulfilled, Christ is always present. And when we utter one word with an evangelical feeling, with love for our neighbor, we will know that at this moment the Living Christ truly stands among us.
And in conclusion of the conversation, I want to call all of us to the feat of evangelical fellowship - the feat that unites us with God. There are some great words about this. Elder Sophronius with which I want to end the conversation:
“Remember, please, the greatness not only of the Divine word, but also of the human. When our human word is spoken in the spirit commanded by Christ, then it acquires divine power. It carries life, truth, because it is the fruit of Christ living in us… And God give us the strength to stay on this monastic path and be responsible for our every thought and every word.”
There are such inspirational words in one book. What is a monastery? The monastery is the most holy place, above Sinai and Tabor. As St. Basil the Great writes, there is no likeness to him in anything “earthly. Only one similarity remains - higher. How does a monastery surpass the world? The fact that people live in it, like angels, in chastity, in the glorification of God, unanimity and love. And, of course, the highest dignity of monastic life, incomprehensible to the world, is obedience. Just as Moses took off his shoes in front of the bush at Sinai, so the monks, figuratively speaking, take off old shoes, that is, they lay aside their old will in order to put on the shoes of the will of the Lord and follow the Lord. Obedience helps them to free themselves from all inner bonds: passions, infirmities, selfishness, worldly wisdom - and in spiritual freedom to aspire to the commandments of God, to the Kingdom of Heaven. Obedience mysteriously gives the monks the Holy Spirit and engenders in them a grace-filled life. Finally, through obedience, they become like Christ Himself. And it is not for nothing that every person entering the monastic life is called a novice and seals his self-denial with a vow during tonsure.
But what is true obedience? What is the meaning of the Holy Fathers in this word? Obviously, obedience is not limited to discipline. He has different goals and character. While discipline only provides order in society, obedience brings a person into a living relationship with Christ. Discipline is only the external submission of one person to another for some earthly purposes. And obedience is a free search for the will of God, which elevates a person to the feat of renunciation of his "I" and is the main reason for the transformation of his soul and holiness.
And a lot depends on what is implanted in the monastery: obedience or simple external submission. Will the brotherhood live and develop, prosper in prayer and all the virtues? Will there be unity in it? All this cannot be achieved through discipline. According to Elder Sofroniy (Sakharov), if a spirit of discipline appears in a monastery, this is “a sure sign of a decline in monasticism.” The laws that govern life in the world are not applicable to monasticism. The monastery is not just an institution, and the abbot is not a manager involved in administrative regulation. He carries out the service of reconciliation of man with God, his relations with the monks are of a sacred nature. And obedience in a monastery is not a management tool, but a sacrament in which a person is reborn by the Holy Spirit. And if the abbot loves his monastery and wants to ensure its future, then the first thing he is called to do is to plant obedience in it.
What are the signs of obedience that distinguish it from discipline? A complete and detailed answer to this question can be found in the book Teachings on Obedience by the Monk Zosima (Verkhovsky), a Russian ascetic of the 19th century. He very accurately conveys the primordial tradition of this virtue, answering all the questions that may arise from novices and spiritual mentors.
Firstly, St. Zosima says that obedience is based on trust, and when receiving brothers into the monastery, the hegumen must see if they are ready to completely trust him. Otherwise, the father and brothers will suffer from each other the same troubles, sorrows and embarrassments, and whether they will be able to achieve their salvation - God knows. If the monk does not have confidence, then all the efforts of the abbot to bring him to God may be in vain, because for such a brother, according to the elder Zosima, “everything commanded by the father will be painful and unpleasant.” For example, the abbot, seeing that his obedience is not useful to a brother, will transfer him to another. The monk will obey outwardly, but harbors resentment in his soul. And this will become an obstacle on his spiritual path. He will not be able to fulfill his new obedience zealously, to sincerely obey his father in anything else, he will lose his prayer, he will envy his brothers, whom the hegumen supposedly loves more. And he will consider his entire monastic life a failure. If a monk does not love the abbot, does not trust him, then for him everything turns into difficulties and ends in tears. While for a monk who loves his spiritual father, the mountains turn into grains of sand! And the more a brother trusts the abbot, the easier the path of monastic life becomes for him, the faster he succeeds in prayer and all the virtues.
Of course, in order for the brethren to fully trust the abbot, it is important that the abbot, by his very life, inspire love and trust in them. In one monastic charter of the 5th century there is even a special clause about this: “The abbot should try to be loved more than to inspire fear.” An interesting commentary on these words is given by Archimandrite Emilian, pro-abbot of the Simonopetra monastery: “Monks should not make efforts to love the abbot, understand him, trust him... If the elder does not attract, does not inspire by himself, then what can novices do? The situation in this case is very difficult. Of course, in any case, they will love their abbot, because this is their duty for the sake of the name of God. But in order to love the unloved, they will experience the hardest struggle, and life in the monastery will become a nightmare, anguish. ... And so the abbot must inspire self-love. Then life in the monastery will be intertwined with the joy of Christ.
In order to be loved by the brethren, the abbot does not have to have great gifts. As Elder Emilian writes, “The abbot is loved not for his talents, not for his holiness or wisdom, but because he is a father, abbot, because in the monastery he represents the image of God.” The sacrament of obedience differs from discipline precisely in that the brothers obey the abbot like children to their father, that is, with complete trust and tender love, and not as it happens in a secular institution, where the elder orders, and the younger ones obey reluctantly or defending their rights.
The hegumen is truly the father of the brotherhood when his leadership is inseparable from the spiritual life, when he sensitively feels the spiritual state of the monks and seeks to find his own approach to everyone. One book gives such an example. Imagine two monks. The first, if the abbot gives him a slap in the face, will be delighted: that's how much the abbot loves him! And the second is very vulnerable due to the fact that his parents treated him badly; and he is embarrassed at the slightest remark. And the abbot is called to correctly assess the strength of each brother and take into account their character, upbringing, weaknesses. As one elder says, the abbot is not a ruler and not a road roller. He does not suppress the novice, but inspires him to voluntary, free obedience. The abbot builds relationships in such a way that the monk always remains in an intense spiritual feat, every day exercising in cutting off his will, and at the same time does not fall into despair if, due to weakness, he cannot fulfill his father’s commands. Health care is especially important. Disagreement in this is one of the frequent reasons why a person loses confidence in his spiritual father and even leaves the monastery. The abbot must subtly feel the line when to persevere, and when it is better to come down.
Often he faces very difficult spiritual tasks. How, for example, to awaken the spirit of asceticism in the brotherhood? How can a brother who constantly thinks about himself and strives for comfort be taught self-sacrifice? How to inspire to the gospel life someone who asks for special clothes or food for himself? Or how to teach someone who requires special attention to himself, not to seek human love, but the love of Christ? If you despise the infirmities of people, then this will not help them. The abbot is called to empathize with their suffering. He must first understand them, so that they can understand him later. And the main thing that the abbot needs in such cases is long-suffering. Theoretically, all monks are called to patience, but in reality it is the abbot who has to be the most patient person in the brotherhood. After all, if monks are obliged to love and sacrifice themselves, then the abbot is even more obliged to love and sacrifice himself. And if he is like that, then he brings peace and reliability to the life of the monastery, and the brothers trust him and obey him with all their hearts.
At the same time, it is important that the monks themselves force themselves to trust the abbot. One Optina elder said: “As a person treats an elder, so does an elder treat him.” If a monk has openness and trust, then the heart of the spiritual father opens to meet him. And even if the abbot is subject to passions and infirmities, for the sake of his novice he will be transformed. Feeling his responsibility, he will pray for his spiritual child, strive to help him, and he himself will grow in love and spiritual work.
But what to do if any monk is still embarrassed by thoughts of distrust towards the abbot? It is important to understand that humility and abandonment of one's will is not an easy task. Obedience is the highest feat for a person with a fallen nature. And therefore, sometimes embarrassment, and unwillingness to obey, and distrust are inevitable - even among people who are soft and meek by nature. And the abbot should encourage the monks, advising them not to be afraid of these thoughts, but to despise them. In the life of the Monk Zosima, such an incident is told. The devil began to sow in the heart of one of his novices aversion to the old man. Ashamed to reveal this to him, she became more and more discouraged. Finally, she confessed to him: “Father, I don’t love you, I can’t even see you with indifference or hear your voice! I always feel annoyed and think: why does this guy live with us? The elder admonished her with love that these were not her thoughts, but the enemy's. She was appeased, but soon the temptation rose up again. This went on for more than a year: the sister cried and told the elder that she hated him, and he answered: “Be patient, be patient. The crown of martyrdom will be yours, unless you listen to the enemy. Actually you love me. Otherwise, I would not cry and would not speak frankly about my feelings, but would judge me with my sisters, look for other mentors and slander me with them. And you truly love me. May the Lord reckon with me this sin of yours.” And the merciful God delivered the sister from temptation and gave her such devotion and faith to the elder that she served him even in his dying illness.
In this story, I want to note one important point. What helped the sister besides the patience and love of the old man? That she was frank with him.
And this is the second condition of true obedience - frankness before the spiritual mentor. Unlike discipline, obedience is always done in dialogue with the individual. And the elder Zosima advises the brother entering the monastery to tell the abbot his whole life, “all his good and evil deeds, committed from youth.” The abbot must help the brother open up so that he sees all his inner difficulties, understands why they occur and, most importantly, how they can be overcome. After all, if a brother does not tell everything and remains alone with his problems, embarrassments and thoughts, then from the internal disorder he will begin to look for some false, wrong ways out. For example, it will fill time with idle talk. Or he will begin to seek solace in food. Or he will be carried away by external activities, indulging in vanity and absent-mindedness. Or vice versa, it will fall into apathy and soreness. All this can be avoided if the novice is frank with the spiritual father.
According to the elder Zosima, if there is no frankness, then one cannot even say that a brother lives in obedience. “Such a brother lives on his own, and not under the guidance of his father.” For example, a monk is silent about any of his embarrassment or sinful thoughts. And the abbot cannot help him in any way, even if he knows about his problems. After all, the essence is in what kind of relationship the brother has with the abbot. His secrecy or frankness shows whether he has confidence in his father, whether he is ready to fulfill everything that his father tells him. And if the novice does not have such an attitude, and the abbot exposes his thoughts, then the brother will inevitably be embarrassed and oppose. It is necessary that he himself voluntarily reveal his thought or sin. The mere fact that he will open up will already be a victory for him over his "I".
In general, the desire to be frank reveals the correct spiritual dispensation of the novice, his very capacity for monastic life. And the elder Zosima advises the abbot "with his benevolence to give boldness to the brothers so that they are free in the revelation of all their feelings and thoughts." Such communication with the abbot is a source of inspiration for the novices, so that they leave him with a cheerful spirit, ready to continue their feat for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven.
Another property of obedience, which distinguishes it from simple external submission, is that obedience is performed consciously, with faith, for the sake of God. As the elder Zosima writes, a monk should never obey “simply, without any thought,” that is, aimlessly and indifferently, becoming like “an animal that is quiet, meek and without reason.”
The biography of Elder Ephraim of Katunak tells how one novice monk complained to him:
I am overcome by gloomy thoughts, and I do not know how to deal with them.
Elder Ephraim immediately understood the reason:
Are you listening to your elder? - he asked.
Yes, father. Whatever the elder tells me, I do, - the monk answered.
Yes, you listen like an animal! Real obedience consists in doing what you are told out of love and zeal for God.
So, since the brother obeyed without living faith, not out of love for God, but only out of habit, he did not receive spiritual fruit. Obedience bears fruit when a monk does it with ardent zeal, with faith and understanding that he obeys for the sake of Christ. And the hegumen inspires the brethren to such obedience when he approaches all questions spiritually. For example, a monk is often late for his obedience. The hegumen can tell him: “Child, your obedience is your gift to God. Try not to be a minute late. From this it will be seen that you live in a feat, and not in a relaxed way. And then the monk, without any coercion and punishment, will decide to do what is appropriate. Whereas ordinary authority compels, spiritual authority puts the monk before God. And in this sense, it can be said that in a monastery there should not be at all an ordinary discipline that is not spiritualized by striving for God. For example, a monk is ordered to bring a bucket of potatoes into the kitchen, and he is called to fulfill this small deed, as entrusted to him by God, as bringing grace and sanctification. Thus, the simplest work in a monastery and any monastic rules acquire a sacred and God-bearing character.
Obedience as a sacrament is characterized by yet another property, inseparably linked with faith in its grace-filled power. Obedience is done with inner freedom and a cheerful, joyful spirit. After all, if a person obeys for the sake of love for Christ, if he believes that through cutting off his will he unites with God, then he simply cannot fulfill his obedience sluggishly and indifferently, as if under a stick.
Often novices, especially beginners, make this mistake. Trying to do exactly what they were told, they do not pay attention to the feeling with which they do it. But, as St. Zosima affirms, it is far from indifferent with what attitude the monk obeys. It depends on this whether the Lord will accept his obedience, whether it will bear good fruit. And this is the main secret of obedience.
Let's take an example. The dean, on behalf of the abbot, asked the brothers to sweep the monastery yard. All the monks seem to be doing the same thing, everyone is obedient; but everyone has their own mood, their own thoughts. One, sweeping, is indignant that he was distracted from his main work, and expresses his indignation aloud. Another forces himself to work in silence, but he is frowning and inwardly distressed. The third has a similar mood, but he realizes that this state of mind is wrong, sinful. And he internally reproaches himself, prays fervently and tries to work with zeal. Finally, the fourth monk works with sincere joy. He is internally free and at any moment is ready to go wherever the abbot blesses him. For him, every work in the monastery, as the holy fathers write, is great and worthy of heaven; in any place he zealously serves God and the brethren.
The Monk Zosima, considering in his book the different degrees of obedience, writes that a monk who obeys only outwardly, while maintaining discontent in his soul, is not pleasing to God. Only that obedience happens according to God, which is done willingly, or at least with forcing oneself to sincere obedience.
Inner, heartfelt obedience is the foundation of monastic life, one of the indispensable conditions for spiritual progress. Even in ancient times, the Monk Hesychius of Jerusalem wrote: “It is fitting for us, who are in a hostel, to voluntarily and with a cheerful heart cut off all our will before the rector.” Cutting off your will is not so easy. Here the monk rendered outward obedience. But does his heart rejoice? Does it express disagreement? Or maybe it responds to someone else's will sluggishly, with sorrow, barely moving towards obedience? “This is not how our heart should be! - as if says the Monk Hesychius. - Not sluggish and relaxed, but vigorous, alive! A monk should not be like a dying man, he should be a warrior, a hero, including in obedience.
After all, when the holy fathers teach cutting off one's own will, this does not mean that a person should become weak-willed. By cutting off one's own will is meant the rejection of the sinful will. But the will that draws a person to God must be very strong. Bishop Athanasius of Limassol said in one of his conversations: “For example, when we talk about dispassion, we do not mean that a person should become insensitive. Passionate does not mean insensitive. The impassive is the one who loves very much, who wants only one thing in this life - the will of God. But he just wants the will of God.
I remember when I decided to enter a monastery, my mother told me: “Does the Church teach such stubbornness”? Yes! When it comes to doing the will of God - of course! Man must resist sin with great strength. The life-giving evangelical spirit is not a spirit of apathy. We are not dead beings, not plants, but we are people, individuals, endowed with the power that calls us to follow the will of God.
And when a person has such a desire for God, then he does not need to be ordered. He himself burns with spirit, he himself seeks obedience, and listens with all his heart to the spiritual father and all the brethren, every moment making sure that he does not fulfill his own will.
However, the question arises: what should a monk do if he still feels internal resistance, unwillingness to obey in some way? Saint Hesychius answers this question. He writes that in the matter of obedience it is necessary to have a special, very subtle art, which consists in the fact that a person "is not embarrassed by bile" . Bile is bitterness, embarrassment when you have to do something that you don’t want at all. And most often it is these embarrassing thoughts, and not some external circumstances, that make the life of a monk fruitless. Not knowing how to “obey with art,” a person can spend many years in a monastery, but at the same time remain in passions, feel disappointment, emptiness. Such a person comes to obedience and immediately comes into conflict with his neighbors. He wants to pray, but he has no sympathy for the words of the prayer, because his mind is constantly restless, overwhelmed by a variety of thoughts. And very often the essence of all these spiritual problems is rooted in the fact that a person simply did not dare to betray himself into obedience, he clings to his will, his desires, his egoism. Own will separates a person from God, and from the spiritual father, and from brothers. Such a person is deprived of the main dignity of a monk - cordial obedience, and, one might say, falls from the height of the monastic rank.
And the Monk Hesychius, revealing the secret of true obedience, urges the monk "not to be embarrassed by bile", that is, to immediately expel bitterness from the heart, which can arise when it is necessary to overcome one's will. And the elder Zosima writes that, feeling grief from the command, a person should in no case leave this feeling in himself. He is called not to give up, not to give up, but to force himself to fulfill the command resolutely, with prayer, trying with all his might to overcome grief. Such obedience can be equated with martyrdom, and it is always crowned with success. Only he remains without fruit who leaves the struggle, who falls into inaction, despairs and says: "I can't do anything." He who labors, who struggles, who steadfastly resists his desires in his heart with prayer, never fails. The grace of God will surely come to him. And he feels that he is no longer upset, that his heart is filled with joy and love for obedience. And with each such case, the monk is more and more freed from his will; it becomes easier and easier for him to obey. Because obedience is a matter of practice, and through constant exercise in it, a monk can achieve perfect unity of his will with the will of God.
And such a monk is the happiest person. Just as a bird enjoys free flight in the heavens, so a zealous novice enjoys obedience, which lifts him up to heaven. And the business of a spiritual father is to always follow very carefully how a monk obeys. If a brother has an embarrassment that he cannot cope with, then you need to help him overcome it. Because if this grief accumulates, it will lead to despondency, which will eventually exhaust the spiritual strength of the monk, so that he will not even be able to continue the monastic life. Although obedience is a feat, it is a feat that should fill the life of a monk with joy. The Monk Silouan of Athos once asked a monk, whom he always saw with a joyful face: “What are you rejoicing about?” The monk replied, "All the brothers love me." "Why do they love you?" - Elder Silouan asked again. “I obey everyone,” the monk replied. It was sincere, heartfelt obedience that brought him deep inner peace. As Elder Silouan wrote, “he found peace through obedience, which he did for the sake of God.”
I would also like to say very briefly about one property of obedience. True obedience is always connected with prayer. It can be said that the whole mysterious, spiritual life of a monk, uniting him with Christ, consists of two deeds - obedience to the abbot and prayer. And as St. Zosima taught, one deed is unthinkable without the other. Whoever goes out of obedience to the spiritual father cannot pray purely. Similarly, one who weakens the sobriety of the mind and abandons prayer cannot maintain true, heartfelt obedience. At the same time, the abbot himself does everything and speaks, based on prayer experience, a prayerful mood. And teaching the monks two deeds - cutting off their will for the sake of Christ and unceasing prayer - he helps them achieve main goal- so that their whole life becomes a stand before God.
And in conclusion of the report, I would like to recall a brief lesson said by one Athos hegumen to his children: “Do you know why the Lord has gathered us here? For us to become saints. Then tell me: if we achieve anything but this, what do you think the result will be? Our monastery will be one of legal entities, and not at all a sacred monastery, a place for the education of souls and the bosom of the Holy Trinity. And only when the sacrament of obedience is placed in the spiritual foundation of the monastery, such a monastery truly becomes a source of life for all who come into contact with it. Because holiness is the norm of life in it, and it no longer has what people all over the world suffer from: the search for primacy, envy, division. In such a monastery, gloomy faces are not visible, but joy reigns everywhere, God truly dwells and acts there. And it is precisely such a monastery that is capable of giving birth to new saints to the world.
Report of Abbess Domnica, abbess of Alexander Nevsky
Novo-Tikhvin Monastery (Yekaterinburg) at the Meeting
abbots and abbesses of Russian monasteries Orthodox Church
(Holy Trinity Sergius Lavra, October 8-9, 2014).
Basil the Great, St. Movement statutes. Ch. 18 // Basil the Great, St. Creations: in 2 vols.
Translation from: Αἰμιλιανὸς Σιμωνοπετρίτης, ἀρχιμ. Λόγοι ἑορτίοι μυσταγωγικοί. Ἀθῆναι: Ἴνδικτος, 2014. Σ. thirty.
Sophrony (Sakharov), hieromonk. On the foundations of Orthodox asceticism // Sophrony (Sakharov), hieromonk. Rev. Silouan of Athos: Life, teachings and writings. Minsk: Beams of Sophia, 2005, p. 497.
See: Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 487.
Translation from: Αἰμιλιανὸς Σιμωνοπετρίτης, ἀρχιμ. Νηπτικὴ ζωὴ καὶ ἀσκητικοὶ κανόνες. Ἑρμηνεία στοὺς ὁσίους πατέρες Ἀντώνιο, Αὐγουστῖνο καὶ Μακάριο. Ἀθῆναι: Ἴνδικτος, 2011. Σ. 348–349.
Translation from: Αἰμιλιανὸς Σιμωνοπετρίτης, ἀρχιμ. Νηπτικὴ ζωὴ καὶ ἀσκητικοὶ κανόνες. Ἑρμηνεία στοὺς ὁσίους πατέρες Ἀντώνιο, Αὐγουστῖνο καὶ Μακάριο. Ἀθῆναι: Ἴνδικτος, 2011. Σ. 347.
Life of the Optina Elder Nectarius. Publishing House of the Holy Vvedenskaya Optina Hermitage, 1996. S. 16.
See: Elder Zosima Verkhovsky: Life and deeds. Sayings and extracts from his writings: at 2 o'clock. Repr. play ed. 1889. M.: Palomnik, 1994. Part 2. S. 14–15.
Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 487.
Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 488.
See: Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 525.
Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 513.
See: Joseph of Vatopedi, Mon. Blessed follower. Biography of Elder Ephraim of Katunak. M .: publishing house of the Moscow Compound of the Holy Trinity St. Sergius Lavra, 2004. P. 161.
See: Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 513.
See: Presbyter Hesychius to Theodulus, a soul-beneficial and saving word, about sobriety and virtue, title. [Ch.] 31 // The Philokalia, or Words and Mainness of Sacred Sobriety: in 2 vols. M.: Sretensky Monastery, 2001. Vol. 1. P. 262
Translation according to the electronic resource: omilies.net
See: Presbyter Hesychius to Theodulus, a soul-beneficial and saving word, about sobriety and virtue, title. [Ch.] 31 // Philokalia, or Words and Mainness of Sacred Sobriety: in 2 vols. M .: Sretensky Monastery, 2001. T. 1. P. 263.
See: Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 513.
Sofroniy (Sakharov), schiarch. Elder Silouan of Athos. M .: Compound of the Russian St. Panteleimon Monastery on Athos, 1996. S. 405.
See: Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 606.
See: Zosima Verkhovsky, St. Teaching about obedience // Sobriety: in 2 volumes. Yekaterinburg: Novo-Tikhvin Convent; M.: Palomnik, 2009. T. 1. S. 591.
Emilian (Vafidis), archim. Words and instructions. The seal is true. Life in the spirit. M.: Publishing House of the Church of the Holy Martyr Tatiana, 2006. P. 161
Today we will talk about love for neighbors - a feeling that can fill every moment of our existence with meaning and joy, and make any everyday situation of communication a spiritual event for us.
Let us recall cases from the lives of saints and ascetics: how they felt love for their neighbors. Here is what Elder Silouan says:
“Once on Pascha I was walking from vespers in the Pokrovsky Cathedral to my mill, and a worker was standing on the road. When I approached him, he asked me to give him an egg. I didn’t have any, and I returned to the Monastery, took two eggs from my confessor, and gave one of them to the worker. He says, "There are two of us." I gave him the second one, and when I left him, I wept out of pity for the poor people, and I felt sorry for the whole universe and every creature.
Another time, also on Easter, I was walking from the main Monastery port to the new Preobrazhensky building and I saw a little boy running towards me, about four years old, with a joyful face, the grace of God amuses the children. I had an egg and I gave the egg to the boy. He was delighted and ran to his father to show his present. And for this little thing I received great joy from God, and I loved every creature of God, and the Spirit of God was heard in my soul. Coming to myself, out of pity for the world, I prayed to God a lot with weeping. O Holy Spirit, dwell in us always; We are well with you."
Each of us can experience something similar. Although it is not customary for us to give each other treats or Love the earth makes some things heaven, but we can wholeheartedly give services, in unlimited quantities. For example, a sister with a heavy bucket passes by you along the corridor, and you help her carry it. A minute later, another sister asks you to bring a book from her cell - you rush with all your might and bring it. Then the dean asks to find a sister for confession - you run around the entire skete and find it. And after that, a joyful and peaceful feeling will certainly appear in the soul. As Elder Silouan says, "The Spirit of God is heard in the soul."
Now let us recall an incident from the life of St. Ignatius that happened to him at a time when he was still a novice:
“At first I was in obedience to the refectory ... Once I put a dish of food on the last table, at which the novices were sitting, and with my thought I said: “Take from me, servants of God, this wretched service.” Suddenly such consolation fell into my chest that I even staggered; the consolation continued for many days, about a month. Another time I happened to go into the prosphora shop; I don’t know why, out of some kind of inclination, I bowed very low to the brethren who were working in the prosphora, and, suddenly, prayer had such an effect on me that I hastened to go to my cell, and lay down on the bed because of the weakness produced in whole body by prayerful action.
And this case also applies to our daily life. When we do our best to force our heart to love, then the Lord visits us with His grace. I think, at least to some extent, all of you have felt the effect of grace during sincere service to others.
Do you see how love can make the most ordinary everyday situation significant and beautiful for us? And if in our soul the feeling of love has already been strengthened, then our whole life becomes joyful and full of meaning. And vice versa, if there is not enough love in our heart, then our life is dull and boring. After all, what exactly is our daily life? It is an almost continuous communication with others in one form or another. In the temple, in obedience, in the cell, in the refectory - we are all the time in communion with other people. We work with our neighbors, we talk with them, we look at them, they often occupy our thoughts. And if we love them, then peace always reigns in our soul, no matter what happens. And if we don’t love, then we feel bad all the time, our neighbors shake our peace all the time. As Elder Emilian says: “The neighbor is the most tangible and real event in our life". How can we make this event always joyful for us? How can we love our neighbors?
Imagine that love is some kind of big capital, let's say a million. How can we collect this million? Very simple. At every step, we come across a penny - that is, some small everyday situation in which we can show love. We can neglect all these pennies - say to ourselves: well, what is a penny, because there is almost nothing at all! But then we will forever remain beggars. We can pick up some pennies when we feel like bending down - but then we will get rich very slowly. And finally, we can not neglect a single penny - and yet they come across literally at every step, you just have to bend down and pick it up - and then we will collect our million pretty soon.
Probably, the main difficulty for us is to see all these “penny”, that is, to recognize those situations in which love is required of us. And now we will consider a variety of situations, reading the teachings of Abba Isaiah the Hermit and applying to them the interpretation of Elder Emilian.
So, the lesson is the first, very short:
"Don't let yourself get carried away."
Elder Emilian says about this teaching:
“You should not be impudent, you should not have the feeling that your neighbor is your property, your friend, your brother, so that you can treat him rudely, tactlessly.”
Indeed, it is most difficult for us to maintain reverence towards those closest to us. It seems to us that it is possible to communicate with them impolitely, to speak rudely, to mock. All this, of course, is done in a playful tone, and it is even considered that this is a sign of friendliness. This is especially common among young people. But really, it shouldn't be. Here is what Elder Joseph the Hesychast says about this:
"Love does not rage." It means decency, decency, integrity. The highest mark of conduct, nobility, once a valiant rival with all other good qualities, now lies in contempt of our lukewarm and indifferent generation. For all that, nobility remains a noteworthy and valuable side of love. Is good behavior really not such an important quality of our personality? Are we not surprised at the kindness, pleasantness, politeness when we see these qualities in the people we meet on our life path? Moreover, we can all recognize that being treated politely by others affects us in ways that soften our cruelty and hostility. So this is what softens the heart, and there is love, which calms all rudeness, all excitement, in a word, “does not act out of order” ”.
Indeed, with which sisters do we like to communicate? Is it not with those who speak to everyone politely and respectfully? And if we are pleased when they talk to us like that, then we will try to communicate with other people delicately, reverently - this will manifest our love.
You all remember the incident from the life of St. Macarius the Great, how once he was walking with his disciple to the Nitrian mountain and asked him to go ahead of him. The student, meeting with the idol priest, told him rudely: “Where are you running, demon?”, For which he severely beat him. And the Monk Macarius, seeing this priest, greeted him affectionately and called him a hard worker, and this touched the priest very much, so that he then converted to Christianity and became a monk. And it must be said that a disparaging word always repels a neighbor and brings discord into relationships, while a word spoken with love, in a friendly tone, touches a person’s heart and brings us closer to him.
Let's read examples of how delicately the ascetics were able to communicate with their neighbors, and I think we will want to behave in the same way. First, an example from the memoirs of the Athos ascetic Father Averky:
“We were all impressed by the meekness, kindness and peaceful dispensation of Father Averky. It was very palpable in him. As a trapper, he quickly and deftly distributed food to the brethren ... He distributed food with such reverence, like an antidoron. He comforted us all!”
Another example of sensitive communication:
“A long time ago and far from us, two admirers-monks entered a monastery. Bowing to the shrine, they gathered in the evening on their way. But since they had to pass through the desert and did not know the way to the next place where they wanted to go, they were given a monk guide. Soon after they set out on the road, night fell, and the night was so dark that the guide lost his way, and the wanderers began to wander in the desert. They walked, they walked, but they did not find the road and did not come to their place. The guide was obviously to blame and he must have been ashamed or embarrassed. How did the strangers react to him? Did they scold him for it? Or at least expressed their dissatisfaction with him? Oh no! They not only did not reproach and did not say a single unpleasant word, but even pretended that they did not notice that their guide had gone astray. One of the wanderers pretended to be unwell and began to ask the travelers to camp in the desert for the night and stay there until morning. Another stranger willingly agreed to this (although he guessed that his companion was only pretending to be unwell for the sake of a guide), and the brethren remained in place until morning, until daylight came. With the onset of day, the guide soon found the way, and all together safely arrived where they were going.
This is how quietly, how calmly we must deal with our neighbors.
And you and I need to be just as delicate in the sense that we follow our every word so as not to upset each other a little.
Now let's read the following teaching of Abba Isaiah:
“When you travel with the brethren and there will be one among them for whom you have the love of God for the sake of it, do not show special closeness to him in front of those; if there were not a weak one among them and would not die of jealousy - and you will bear his sin, because you gave him a reason to sin.
This situation also often occurs in our monastery. It happens that we are disposed towards some sisters more than others, and we do not hide it. Just now we were talking to one sister affably and affectionately, and then another approached, and immediately our tone changes to dry and cold. A sister who notices such a difference is tempted and upset, and at the same time we are responsible for her offense. Elder Emilian says:
“The reason [that the neighbor was upset] is in the special disposition that you showed to another.
Will you tell me - is he so weak? Yes, such are the souls of men. I cannot demand from my neighbor that he be strong. I myself must be strong. I cannot demand anything from my neighbor. I can only demand from myself. So, you need to be careful that my attitude is equal to everyone. What attention is needed for all of us to be one brotherhood!”
Of course, this is our human nature: we willy-nilly love some sisters more than others. But we have no right to show this special love openly, because it might hurt someone. And we should still try to love other sisters as much as we love a select few.
I ask you to pay attention to this moment. Elder Emilian says that we cannot demand from our neighbors that they be strong. And sometimes it seems to us that everyone who came to the monastery must always be strong, so we can be strict with each other. Actually, this is the wrong attitude. We should have a clear feeling that the monastery is not just some kind of institution for achievement, but it is our family. In a good family, people treat each other very carefully, take into account all the weaknesses, do not require too much from each other. It should be exactly the same in our monastery. One great example of a condescending attitude can be found in the Memorable Tales:
“Before the arrival of Abba Pimen with his disciples in Egypt, there lived an old man who had great fame and was respected. But people left him and began to go to Abba Pimen when he and the brethren came from the skete. This upset Pimen. He said to the brothers: “What shall we do with that great old man? It is regrettable that everyone left him and turned to us, insignificant people. How can we comfort the old man? Prepare food and take a measure of wine, let's go to the old man and share a meal with him. Maybe we can console him through this.” We took our food and left. When they knocked on the door of the elder, his disciple, hearing it, asked: “Who are you?” They answered: "Tell the abba that Pimen wishes to receive a blessing from him." When the disciple told the elder about this, he answered: “Go away, I don’t have time.” But Abba Pimen and the brethren stood in the heat and said: “We will not leave here until we are worthy to see the elder.” The elder was touched by their humility and patience and opened his cell to them. They went in and had lunch together. During dinner, the elder said to them: “Truly I tell you, I have heard a lot about you, but in fact I see in you a hundred times more.” From that day on, they became friends."
Just think, Abba Pimen could have treated this ascetic more severely – after all, he seemed to be to blame for his chagrin. He succumbed to vanity, and therefore was upset. Abba Pimen could have said: “Is it my fault that everyone started coming to me for advice? Let him struggle with his shameful passion, do not pay attention to him. But he acted differently.
We also find examples of condescension in the lives of ascetics closer to us in time, for example, in the life of St. Zosima (Verkhovsky). You probably remember how once he blessed his sisters to pray in the forest at night and for this he arranged crosses for them on Christmas trees. The youngest of the sisters, Margarita, also had a burning desire to perform night vigils, and the elder blessed her. Next I will read:
“Okay,” he said, “I’ll make a cross for you on this Christmas tree,” pointing to the closest cell to his; for he knew her infirmity, that she, like a child, was afraid of everything: not only what kind of insurance, but every rustle frightened her. “Here's a Christmas tree and a cross on it, not far from my cell, come here and pray,” Father Zosima said. And when Margarita came to pray at night, the elder quietly, so that she did not know, went out onto the porch of his cell and stood from afar, looking at her. And if he once noticed that she was beginning to be shy, anxious, looking around, then he gave her a voice, saying: “Pray, pray - do not be afraid; I'm standing on the porch." Such paternal love and his care, as a guardian angel, even more inspired her, like the rest of the sisters, to prayer.
And another example from the life of an old man:
“As a guardian of sacred silence, Father Zosima at times moved away from his sisters and from all cares. But also as a loving father, he did not leave his devoted students for a long time. He went only to his cell for five days, of which he spent most of the summer in the forest. All the sisters, respecting his silence, did not disturb him these days. But two of them, whether through cowardice or ardent devotion to him, could not endure even five days. Not daring to go straight to their father, so as not to break his silence and not give a reason to other sisters, they looked for an opportunity in every possible way, so that at least from a distance they could see their father, or hear his voice. And so sometimes they went out onto the path along which he returned from the forest to his cell, and, bowing to him from a distance, asked for blessings; and he did not reject their zeal, he stayed with them for a few minutes, showing a paternal disposition, and they returned in great consolation. Sometimes in the evening, taking firewood, they brought it to his cell and, placing it at the door, purposely made a knock so that the old man could hear, and he, having heard, asked from inside the cell: “Who is there?” - "It is we, father, who brought you firewood," they answered; then, with fatherly mercy, he, opening the door of his cell to them, said: “What should I do with you? You are definitely children! Well, get up, get up"; and their joy was unspeakable; and the elder sometimes allowed me to stay with him for a little while; and sometimes, having consoled them with paternal love and an edifying word, he immediately released them with a blessing.
You know, it's always nice to hear when there are sisters in certain obediences who bear the infirmities of others. We are all with different characters, all with our weaknesses: someone easily succumbs to anger, someone falls into despondency for any reason. But these sisters are not tempted by anything - this is the most important thing: they are not tempted - and retain love for those who show weakness. Even if next to them is a person who, like gunpowder, flares up at the slightest pretext - with their peaceful disposition, they quickly extinguish his flashes. Thanks to these sisters, there are no quarrels in their obediences, there is no tense atmosphere, and most importantly, they themselves keep peace in their souls.
Let us read the following teaching of Abba Isaiah:
“If you take a cell from someone to live in it for several days, do not ruin anything and do not arrange anything in it without first asking the one who gave it to you whether this is pleasing to him or not, for this is shamelessness.”
True, it doesn’t happen with us that one sister will let another live in her cell, we don’t have such an opportunity. But we may have, for example, such a situation: a sister has just been placed in a cell with other sisters. And now, for example, she does not like the way the bedside tables stand here - in other cells she saw that the bedside tables were placed much more conveniently. How should she behave? Elder Emilian says that she must change nothing, no matter how much she wants to. Here is what he writes:
“People, especially young people, have some kind of mania. Wherever they go, they change everything. They think that everything is wrong. The sofa will go there, the table is wrong here, you need to put it exactly in the middle. This icon will go to the other side. It needs to be plastered, it needs to be whitewashed.
Not! Abba Isaiah says. This is not monastic behavior. The one who let you into his cell wants to see everything as he has it. The fact that you come and try to change everything there means that you are saying, as it were, “Fool, haven’t you seen this for so many years? As soon as I entered, I immediately understood how it was necessary. But don't do that, first ask him if he likes the changes you want to make. If he agrees, do it. But if he is dissatisfied with this, do not change anything, because this is dishonesty. A wonderful word for expressing the character of people who change something, not realizing that they offend those who let them into their cell.
We can do the same in our obediences. Suppose you are given some kind of obedience. You perform it for two years, and then another one takes your place. He, only having accepted this obedience, begins to say: “This must be thrown out, this is not necessary, this is superfluous.” What will you feel when you see this? You will be upset, upset. And you, brother, making these changes, are you a man or an animal? Only the animal looks around itself without feeling the human soul. You prefer that your eyes be calm, and not the soul of another person. You do not care that you hurt your neighbor, that he may suffer, cry.
Of course, all this does not mean that we should not try to change something for the better in the cell or in obedience, in general in the monastery. It's all about how we do it. It is very important to always feel that there are other people next to us who have their own opinions, their own vision, their own experience, and we need to feel that any of our actions touches them in one way or another.
We can consider this teaching more broadly. What is more important for us in general: to feel good for us or for others to feel good? Who do we see first: ourselves or others?
The Monk Isaac the Syrian tells about one ascetic named Antony that if he had a choice to do something useful for himself or for his neighbor, he never dared to choose himself. Because in the benefit of his neighbor he saw his own benefit, namely, spiritual benefit.
We should also have such a dispensation: that we never, in any situation, decide to prefer ourselves to our neighbor. At least in order not to be tormented by remorse later. Elder Paisius Svyatogorets tells an example from his life:
“Once in a civil war, a rebel maneuver cut us off from the rest of the forces beyond a village. The soldiers were going to cast lots about who should go to the village for food. “I will go,” I said. If someone inexperienced and inattentive had gone, they could have killed him, and then my conscience would have tormented me. “It will be better,” I thought, “if they kill me than someone else, and then my conscience will kill me all my life. How can I bear this?"
Of course, it's not just a matter of remorse. When we give in to selfishness, we move away from God. We are, as it were, closed within ourselves, we are closed from all sides. In our thoughts, in our hearts, we are the only ones. And the Lord, appreciating our freedom, cannot enter our hearts, because we ourselves do not let Him in. We need to drive ourselves out of our hearts for the Lord to come in. Elder Paisius also discusses this.
“The one who thinks only about himself, falls into isolation both from people and from God - into double isolation - and does not accept Divine Grace. Such a person is good for nothing. And look: after all, the one who constantly thinks only about himself, about his difficulties and the like, in a moment of need, no one will support even humanly. It is clear that he will not receive Divine support, but he will not receive human support either! Then this person will seek help here and there, that is, he will suffer to find help from people, but he will not be able to find it. And vice versa: about the one who does not think about himself, but constantly, in the good sense of the word, thinks about others - God thinks about such a person all the time. And then other people also think about him. The more a person forgets himself, the more God remembers him. Here, for example, in a cenobitic monastery, one in whom there is love sacrifices himself, gives himself to others. Do you think others don't notice? And how can they not think of this soul, which gives itself entirely to others, but does not think of itself? And how can God not think of this soul?” .
So, let's let God take care of all our needs, both large and small. And we ourselves will think only of our neighbors. This should be the absolute rule without any exceptions.
“When you go to someone, do not expect that they will be very glad to see you, so that when they receive you, you will thank God.”
This is an age-old problem both in the world and in the monastery: we all want to be loved, to be affectionate with us. Abba Isaiah offers a simple solution to this problem. When you go to some sister, you should not expect that she will be very happy to meet you. Maybe she's tired, upset, sick. If you expect to be accepted with joy, then most likely you will be disappointed. But even if your sister is ready to receive you cordially and kindly, then, because you were expecting a special reception, everything will seem wrong to you and you will leave with grief. And if you go without expecting anything, then no matter how you are treated, you will maintain a peaceful mood.
So the first rule is not to expect or demand love from others.
The Athonite elder Porfiry Kavsokalivit speaks of the second rule:
“Let's selflessly distribute our love to everyone, regardless of their attitude ... It is selfishness to want others to speak kindly to us. Let the contrary behavior not upset us. Let others talk to us the way they feel. Let's not ask for love. Our endeavor should be to love them and pray for them wholeheartedly. Then we will notice that everyone loves us without any effort on our part, without our asking for love. They will love us freely and sincerely from the bottom of their hearts, without violence on our part. When we love without seeking to be loved, then everyone will gather around us like bees. It works for everyone."
To some, this instruction may seem difficult to implement. Someone will say: well, how can I distribute love if I don’t have it? We can use the advice of St. Zosima, which he offered to one of his sisters.
“Father Zosima, filled with love for God and neighbor, by his own example, as well as by his legends and instructions, most of all tried to instill peace, unanimity and love in the sisters of his hostel. And when she said to him: “Father, why does she (calling the name) not love me? What did I do to her? Who told you that she doesn't love you? the elder objected, “your own thought, or the enemy is the devil. Don't believe it!" “No, father,” said the sister, “not only all her actions and words and her treatment of me prove this, but my heart also hears that she is not disposed towards me.” - “Well, let the truth be yours. But go out into the forest and shout: “My friend! Beloved sister! .. ”- and the echo will answer the same. Shout: "Fool, worthless!" and so on, and the echo will be like this. Believe me, that in the relationship of souls, in spiritual communion, sympathy happens as a true echo. And so look first into your heart: it is true that there is a dislike in it. Therefore, first incline your heart to peace and love, and an echo will certainly resonate in the soul of your spiritual sister.” “What am I to do, father? I myself am not glad that my heart no longer lies with her. - "No love? continued the elder, “do deeds of love. - If you know what your sister wants, give it back; if something contradictory happens, yield; if she gets excited, shut up and blame yourself, and ask for forgiveness. And most of all, pray for her, saying: “Save her, Lord, and with her holy prayers have mercy on me, a sinner,” then the Lord will certainly give you peace and love.
How else can we force ourselves to love? Let's see what Abba Isaiah advises:
“If a wanderer brother comes to you, have a cordial face towards him, greeting him, and carry the burden that he carries, carry it yourself.”
Elder Emilian says more about this:
“If an outside brother comes to your monastery, then when you greet him, your face should be smiling, pleasant, bright, should glow with joy. And if he carries something heavy, such as a suitcase, then you yourself carry it to the cell where he will live. When he leaves, say goodbye to him again with a smile, so that when he leaves, he will remember your care, your love and tenderness. May the image of your love remain with him forever, wherever he goes."
Of course, it is good to remember this teaching not only in relation to guests. This should be our daily relationship with each other. To bring joy to another sister, to serve her even in some trifle - let not a single day pass without this. This should become for us, as it were, a habit, a need.
I don’t know whether you heard or not that Father Andrei (Mashkov) had, for example, such a habit - to give something to everyone who came to him. He himself had almost no things, but he simply could not let a person go without a gift. He gave spoons that he carved himself, he could give his own towel or salt shaker with salt.
In the Trinity-Sergius Lavra not so long ago, several decades ago, there lived a monk who had exactly the same habit. There are touching memories of him:
“[Father Pavlin] liked to give something to a person. It was directly the disease of the elder of God ...
Here, for example, he is sitting at a meal in the fraternal dining room. Everyone eats what is served to everyone. Soup, porridge, tea, sugar, sometimes fruits in summer. Here, next to Father Pavlin, a young hieromonk is sitting. They served tea. The hieromonk, as almost everyone does, threw his three pieces of sugar into a mug of tea, stirred it, and drank it. He looks - under his nose there are still three pieces of sugar. Where? Who brought? Who put? He looks around, confused. Father Pavlin does not even show it, he sits and drinks his sweet tea. And then he will turn to his brother and quietly hint: “What are you drinking without sugar, brother? Are you fasting?..”
Or here he goes, bent over, from the temple along the road, he meets a novice: “Father, bless,” and stretches out his folded hands. Father Peacock blesses and moves on. The novice looks: what a miracle - in his hands "out of nowhere" are three beautiful sweets. How did the elder manage to bless and even give candies? This is already his secret. So, in advance, seeing a novice walking from afar, he reached into his pocket, took out sweets that an old woman who met him gave him to commemorate the deceased, and now, blessing, he thrust them into his young brother so that he would not be discouraged, but would have a little fun with these gifts.
Here is a monk-student in his cell. He came to visit the old man, and most importantly, brought him a transmission from the checkpoint. Some compatriot brought two jars to the old man: one of raspberry jam, and the other of pickled porcini mushrooms. So the student brought them to give to the elder.
“Hey, you are my dear brother,” Father Pavlin will say quite seriously, “yes, you have come to the wrong address. Here, on a jar, it is written not to Peacock at all, but to another. “No, father,” protests the newcomer, “I myself read that this was handed over to you. After all, it’s written right here: to Father Pav ... Pav ... Pimen. “Well, here, here,” the old man perks up, “I’m telling you that you’ve come to the wrong place. Bring it on, brother, it's more likely to go to Father Pimen. He just sounds like he's sick. He caught a cold, you know, and raspberry jam is the way for him ... ”Father Peacock has already managed to sign a different name on the jar and hurries the embarrassed monk to send the raspberries to a new address. The brother, having been blessed, leaves and is perplexed how he, a student of the Academy, could confuse the names.
What a wonderful occupation it is, what a wondrous habit it is to give ... "Blessed are the merciful ones, for they shall receive mercy" (Matt. 5, 7) ".
We, of course, cannot give gifts without blessing. But we can please our neighbors in a different way: to respond to every request, and even better, to serve them without any request. For example, you see that the dean is looking for a churchwoman - offer yourself. Elder Emilian says:
“A real monk cannot say no, because then his soul, his conscience will be tormented, and he will not be able to sleep. Such a refusal is unnatural in the spiritual life. What your neighbor asks of you is a commandment. And even if he didn’t ask, but you understood that he needs it, you are obliged to give it to him, because the neighbor is always higher.”
I think many sisters would willingly obey this rule, but they are held back by fear. They think that if they decide to give themselves completely to their neighbors, then it may turn out that they will never have time to pray, read the holy fathers - and their spiritual life will go wrong. For this reason, they rarely agree to help this or that sister, and even more rarely offer help themselves. However, by doing so they destroy the very foundation of their spiritual life. Not helping others, they bring discord into their souls, into relationships with their neighbors, and finally move away from God. Here is what Elder Emilian writes about this:
“When there is discord in the relationship between two or more people, these people can neither pray nor read. God hides from the eyes of people when one’s neighbor is lost… For this reason, Abba Isaiah and all ascetic fathers, as a guarantee of our love for God, as the foundation and condition of our unity with God, and as a support for the existence of spiritual life, consider our neighbor… Everything that spoils our relationship, must be eliminated, for it will certainly upset our relationship with God.
One can recall as an example the feat of one simple monk of the Trinity-Sergius Lavra - Father Alexander Kumachev. He was a buyer in the Lavra, that is, he bought clothes, food and everything else necessary for life for the brethren. He put his whole soul into this simple service. Here is how one of his contemporaries recalls him:
“It was especially difficult for Father Alexander to cope with his obedience in the years when everywhere and everywhere there was a lack of the most necessary (here we are talking about the fifties of the 20th century, that is, the Soviet era). Then Father Alexander literally knocked himself off his feet just to get something for the brethren... If somewhere in the market or in the store he was initially denied what he asked for, then he knew how to settle all this and one way or another he achieved his goal.
“Red-haired, red-haired,” the young monks called him, who are more agile. But Father Alexander was not at all offended. He himself knew very well that you would not find anyone redder than him in the whole world. His face broke into a wide smile, and as if nothing had happened, he peacefully and cheerfully talked with the young people who called him so “politely”.
After all, this is what happens in life. Some people read the word of God and go to church not very infrequently, and they seem to treat people according to all the rules of Christian morality, but still they cannot properly improve their spiritual life. Everything with him goes topsy-turvy, everything is haphazard and as it should be. In a word, there is no real spiritual life, no breath of grace in his soul. And another person completely "left" in others. It is as if he does not take care of himself at all, he prays little, and he rarely goes to church, and he reads little divine books, but he lives not by himself, but by others, gives them all his strength and suffers for them. They are not at all close to him and not relatives, but in them his whole life. Both physically and spiritually, he is sick of them, worries about them, takes care of them.
Father Alexander was such a person. All his piety, all his prayer, all the minutes of his life were dedicated not to himself, not even to his spiritual perfection, but to the benefit of his neighbors, caring for them, their health, food, clothing, and so on... all his strength, and ... such a selfless feat was lovingly accepted by the Lord.
I would like you to understand this example correctly. It may seem that only service to our neighbor is required of us, and in doing it, we can forget about prayer, reading, attending worship services. No, it certainly isn't. Prayer remains our main activity. But we must remember that we will never be able to pray properly if we do not diligently serve our neighbors. And vice versa, when we serve sincerely, with love, the Lord grants us prayerful success even in the midst of the most vain service. This is evidenced by the example of Elder Siluan, who excelled greatly in prayer, fulfilling vain obediences all his life. Here is what the elder himself writes about it:
“Many monks say that the steward has no time to pray and that he cannot maintain peace of mind, because he has to be with the people all day long. But I will say that if he loves people and thinks about his workers: "The Lord loves His creation," then the Lord will give him unceasing prayer, for to the Lord all things are possible.
The foundation of spiritual life – both for those people who are just beginning it, and for those who already have some experience, and for those who have reached perfection – the foundation for all is the same: love for neighbors. We must understand that love is not just a good, joyful relationship. To love means to serve, to forgive, to condescend, to endure. True love is a constant rejection of yourself, your "I".
Elder Emilian has very apt words: “You live with fifty brothers and must find a way to get along with them and live in harmony. This is the best penance." And for you and me, the best austerity is to live in harmony with one hundred and fifty sisters, get along with them and serve them, not missing a single opportunity to show love.
Elder Sofroniy (Sakharov) says the same thing:
“[Everything] starts with the simplest things. The abbot says: "Please bring coal to the kitchen." You pour a bucket and carry it. And this act prepares you for the great reception of love. And if you do not do this, you will not achieve anything ... Now, when we are full of passions and sin, gradually, through obedience, through service to others, through the manifestation of love and patience, we prepare ourselves for a higher state.
Love already here on earth can make our life a paradise. Everything depends only on us. In conclusion of the conversation, I would like to cite an interesting parable told by the elder Paisios the Svyatogorets.
“Once a simple man asked God to show him heaven and hell. And then one night in a dream this man heard a voice: "Come, I will show you hell." Then he was in the room. There was a table in the middle of it, many people were sitting at it. There was a pot full of food on the table. But the people were hungry: they scooped long spoons from the pan, but could not bring the spoons to their mouths. Therefore, some of them grumbled, others screamed, others cried ... Then he heard the same voice: "Come, now I will show you paradise." Then he ended up in another room, where there was the same table with a saucepan, and people with long spoons were also sitting around him. However, they were all full and cheerful, because each of them, scooping food from the pan, fed the other with his spoon. Now you understand how you can still feel paradise in this life?
If you have love, kindness - you are an angel, and wherever you go and wherever you are, you carry paradise with you. So, already in this life we begin to feel heaven or hell.
So, sisters, let's make love the foundation of all our lives. In any, the most insignificant situation, we will always be guided by love, condescend to each other, serve each other, live with each other. Then our whole life in every moment of it will be a spiritual feat, which will bring us great joy in earthly life, and in the future will elevate us to eternal heavenly blessings.
Abbess Domnica (Korobeinikova)
Alexander Nevsky Novo-Tikhvinsky Monastery. Yekaterinburg (http://www.sestry.ru/church/)
Used photos from the website of the monastery
- Elder Silouan, life and teachings. M.: Resurrection; Minsk: University; Novokazachye, Orthodox community, 1991. S. 337-338.
- Creations like in the saints of our father St. Ignatius, Bishop of Stavropol. Ascetic experiences, vol. I. (Reprint. ed.) M .: Sretensky Monastery Publishing House, 1998. S. 279.
- Elder Joseph of Vatopedi. Words of consolation: Conversations about spiritual life and monasticism. Bogoroditse-Sergiev Hermitage, 2005. S. 180.
- Archpriest Grigory Dyachenko. Lessons and examples of Christian love. The experience of catechetical reading. M .: "Pilgrim", 1998. S. 72.
- Hegumen Mark (Lozinsky). Father of the preacher. 1221 examples from the Prologue and Patericons. Sergiev Posad: Publishing House of the Holy Trinity Sergius Lavra, 1997. S. 208-209.
- Elder Zosima Verkhovsky. Life and deeds. Sayings and extracts from his writings. In 2 parts. Part 2. (reprinted ed.) M .: "Palomnik", 1994. S. 24-25.
- Elder Zosima Verkhovsky. Life and deeds. Sayings and extracts from his writings. In 2 parts. Part 2. (reprint. ed.) M .: "Palomnik", 1994. S. 29.
- Elder Paisios of the Holy Mountain of blessed memory. The words. T. II. Spiritual awakening. Suroti, Thessaloniki, Monastery of the Holy Apostle and Evangelist John the Theologian; M.: Ed. House "Holy Mountain", 2001. S. 205.
- Elder Paisios of the Holy Mountain of blessed memory. The words. T. II. Spiritual awakening. Suroti, Thessaloniki, Monastery of the Holy Apostle and Evangelist John the Theologian; M.: Ed. House "Holy Mountain", 2001. S. 210-211.
- Elder Porfiry Kavsokalivit. Life and words. Maloyaroslavets: Edition of the St. Nicholas Chernoostrovsky Convent, 2006. S. 270-271.
- Elder Zosima Verkhovsky. Life and deeds. Sayings and extracts from his writings. In 2 parts. Part 2. (reprinted ed.) M .: "Palomnik", 1994. S. 31.
- Archimandrite Tikhon (Agrikov). The Trinity is winged. Memories. Part 1-2. Sergiev Posad: Holy Trinity Sergius Lavra; Perm: Orthodox Society "Panagia", 2000. S. 305-307.
- Archimandrite Tikhon (Agrikov). The Trinity is winged. Memories. Part 3. Sergiev Posad: publishing house of the Holy Trinity Sergius Lavra, 2002. S. 175-177.
- Elder Silouan, life and teachings. M.: Resurrection; Minsk: University; Novokazachye, Orthodox community, 1991. S. 375.
- Archimandrite Sophrony (Sakharov). Spiritual Conversations. T. 1. Essex: St. John the Baptist Monastery; M .: "Pilgrim", 2003. S. 226-227.
Are there true disciples in our time? And are there real elders? Every monk can be a real novice, and every abbot can be a real elder, according to the organizers of the conference “Patriotic Heritage and Athos Traditions: Spiritual Guidance.”
The conference will be held in Yekaterinburg on May 27-29, 2016; it is timed to coincide with the celebration of the 1000th anniversary of the Russians on Mount Athos. Famous confessors of Athos and Greece agreed to take part in it: Metropolitan Athanasius of Limassol; hegumen of the Simonopetra monastery, archimandrite Elisha; abbot of the Xenophon monastery, Archimandrite Alexy and others.
Abbess Domnika (Korobeinikova), abbess of the Alexander Nevsky Novo-Tikhvin Monastery in Yekaterinburg, who, with her blessing, is the curator of the conference, talks about what will be heard at the conference.
— Mother, why was this topic chosen for the conference: spiritual guidance?
– Because now this is one of the most pressing issues for Russian monasticism. A few years ago, His Holiness Patriarch Kirill said that the time had passed when it was necessary to hastily restore monastic buildings - now it's time to revive the spiritual life. And the revival of spiritual life begins precisely with spiritual guidance. If the abbot is engaged in the spiritual guidance of the brethren, if this is the main thing for him, then the fraternity will spiritually flourish even under some outwardly difficult conditions, in poverty, for example.
– What issues are of most concern to abbots and abbesses as spiritual leaders of brotherhoods and sisterhoods?
- One of the most important questions: how to create an atmosphere of love and unity in the brotherhood with all the differences in characters? How can we teach brothers or sisters to bear each other's burdens? The unity of brotherhood is necessary condition spiritual life and at the same time a sign of the success of the brotherhood. One of the reports will be devoted to this topic at the conference.
Of course, everyone is concerned about issues related to the spiritual education of each monk or nun. How to teach obedience to a monk without suppressing his personality at the same time? How to find a reasonable line between indulgence and severity? When it is necessary to submit the monks to uniform rules, and when it is required individual approach to everyone? The last question, I think, is especially important. Since ancient times, the Holy Fathers have been talking about the need for a personal approach in spiritual guidance. The salvation of a person often depends on this. There is such a story in the Patericon. One day three monks came to Abba Achilles, and one of them was notorious. The first monk asked the elder: "Abba, weave a net for me." But he replied: "No, I will not gossip." The second one also asked: “Maybe you can gossip for me, abba?” “No, I can’t,” the old man said again. Finally, the third monk, about whom there was bad fame, also asked: “Abba, I really need a net, weave it for me.” And Abba Achilles said: "I'll gossip for you." The first two monks were surprised and then asked the elder again: “Why did you refuse us, abba, and answered this negligent person:“ yes ”?” Abba said, “Because I know that you will not be sad. And this poor fellow would have thought: "The abba refused me, because he had heard about my sins and despises me." And he would have lost his last hope. This is how this spiritually wise elder acted, applying himself to the dispensation of the brethren. The same approach is needed in spiritual guidance. The abbot is called to know the souls of the brethren very well and to look for what is useful to everyone at one time or another. Of course, this is a very difficult matter, and it seems to me that a report on this topic prepared by an experienced spiritual father, Father Elijah (Rago), will be of interest to everyone.
Today, the question of how it is possible in a monastery to help a person overcome selfishness and isolation is also very relevant, and what is the difference between the solitude necessary for a monk and loneliness as a spiritual problem. Father Elisha, abbot of the Simonopetra monastery, is preparing a report on this topic.
Separately, questions will be discussed about the practice of the revelation of thoughts, about teaching monks to pray, about the peculiarities of the psychology of modern people and, in this regard, about the peculiarities of the spiritual guidance of newcomers who have just come from the world.
– In your opinion, how capable of monasticism are modern people, especially young people?
- Youth is characterized by maximalism. Always, at all times, the young had a heightened sense of truth, a thirst for the real, the beautiful, the eternal. The current civilization is trying to stifle this thirst: modern man is surrounded by comfort as never before, all earthly blessings are available to him. But, on the other hand, right now it is more obvious than ever that earthly goods cannot satisfy a person. And it's disappointing false values that the world imposes on us very often becomes a turning point for young people, finding God. And the most ardent souls, having felt the love of God, respond to it in the most resolute, “maximalist” manner: they give everything to God, dedicate their whole life to Him. And if they find a place where they see that they can satisfy their spiritual thirst, then they leave everything and go there.
First of all, a living example is especially important for young people. If they see love between brothers or sisters in a monastery, feel a special monastic spirit that is born from prayer, obedience, non-possession, ascetic life, see people who truly renounce the world, then zeal for God flares up in them, they want to penetrate into the mystery of this life. And it is also very important for young people to find spiritual guidance in the monastery, that is, to find a person whom they can completely trust and obey in everything. For young man seeking God, this is more important than even asceticism near famous shrines or in some secluded desert place. Where there is spiritual guidance, young people mainly go there. So it was in ancient times, and so it is now.
“Spiritual guidance is a heavy burden. How many are capable of being true spiritual leaders? This requires a huge spiritual experience, special gifts from God.
- I like one reasoning of the famous modern elder Archimandrite Emilian, pro-abbot of the monastery Simonopetra. He says that the abbot in the brotherhood is loved not for his talents, not for his mind or prudence, but because he is a father, an elder (an elder in the sense that it is understood on the Holy Mountain, that is, a person to whom the brethren entrusted themselves into obedience). What makes a monk a true monk? Not some special spiritual gifts, but obedience. And what makes the abbot a true spiritual leader of the brotherhood? Love and attention to each brother. The more the abbot invests in each brother, the greater the return he will receive. It often seems that the abbot, as the main leader in the brotherhood, should not be concerned with trifles, for example, deciding what to read to each brother, what things it is useful for him to have, what rule he should follow, whether it is possible for a brother to leave the monastery on this or that business, or is it spiritually hurt what instruction to give today to one brother, and what to another, and so on. But in fact, when the abbot deals with all these "little things", then he avoids many problems. Spiritual life is made up of little things. With such guidance, each brother grows spiritually, and the entire brotherhood becomes strong, united, united around its spiritual father. It is these various “little things” that determine the life of the brotherhood that we would like to talk about at the conference.