Why does a man suffer when he loves. Love addiction: male confession. They obsessively pursue their hobbies
Many people who suffer from depression do this in silence, without speaking to anyone. More recently, the deaths of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade have shaken the world, so there has been renewed discussion about suicide and mental illness, and how dangerous they can be. In particular, we are talking about depression, which is one of the most common and dangerous among all mental illnesses.
According to a 2012 study, only 35 percent of people diagnosed with depression seek professional help. Yes, no matter how compassionate and considerate you are, your loved ones can be very successful in hiding their depression and its symptoms. Depression is more common than you might think.
To notice the disease quickly and effectively, you should pay attention to these symptoms. And remember, if you or the person you love is suffering from depression or suicidal tendencies, you should call hotline psychological help.
Depression is a condition that can be incredibly dangerous. She can lead to horrible consequences, among which even fatal outcome. Naturally, no one wants this for their loved ones and relatives. That is why you need to arm yourself with this useful information and carefully monitor the condition of those people who are dear to you. If you notice any of these symptoms, you need to make every possible effort to help your loved ones. You can do it yourself or try to convince your loved ones who suffer from this disease to contact professionals.
Remember that a person suffering from depression is in most cases unable to help himself, so if this person is close to you, you need to understand that the responsibility for him lies on your shoulders. Determining the presence of depression is very difficult, and that is why you need this article.
When you manage to determine the presence of depression in a person close to you, make every effort not to leave him to the mercy of fate, because, although he will never admit it, he needs help and support most of all. Depression is very dangerous, so in no case should you neglect it.
They are incredibly lively.
This variant of the disease, which is also known as "smiling depression", manifests itself in people as a persistent mask for the outside world, even though they are also fighting their inner demons. The person close to you may not even be aware that he has depression. Or he may overcompensate to convince you that everything is fine.
They obsessively pursue their hobbies
A person who suffers from depression or any other mental illness very often turns to hobbies to feel some degree of control over their own emotions. Even though these hobbies can be healthy, like tennis or running, the obsessive nature of exactly how people get involved in them is clear sign that they avoid other emotions.
They always choose their words carefully
If your loved one chooses words more carefully than usual when around you, they may be trying to hide symptoms of depression from you. Therefore, if you notice that your friend or relative is more modest, reserved and thoughtful than usual, he may at this moment fight his inner demons, which are invisible to you.
They keep you at arm's length
People who silently suffer from depression may be pushing you away from themselves without even realizing it. They can also protect you in this way from their own mood swings. Many people who suffer from depression lose their social appetite, which means they don't have the energy to laugh and connect with other people. For them, everything is extremely tiring, so they tend to move away from those they love.
They show no emotion in front of you.
Another common symptom of depression is the inability to feel anything at all. This explains why your loved one may not laugh, cry, or show any emotion in front of you. He may look like a zombie to those who look at him from the side.
They don't eat or drink in front of you.
People who suffer from mental illness have a reduced appetite, and although they may go out of their way to hide this from you, they dramatic weight loss(or in some cases drastic weight gain) is obvious to you. Moreover, you may notice that they try not to go on diets, as people suffering from depression can hardly follow a specific routine.
They often start talking about death
Even if your loved one is not suicidal himself, they may be inclined to bring the subject of death up in everyday conversations. Or, if he does not speak openly about death, he may obsessively read news and other materials that deal with death in any way, as he may be confronted with thoughts of death on a daily basis.
They only open to you.
If your partner, friend or relative confides in you, the reason may be that they trust you the most and therefore feel the need to take some of the weight off their shoulders. Luckily for your loved one, this good sign that he is actively seeking help. However, many others (for example, more than 40 percent of university students educational institutions) never ask for help.
They can ask for help and then take back the request.
They may even ask you for help in a moment of sobriety or panic, and then immediately withdraw their request, saying that they were simply overwhelmed by feelings. Or they can come up with any other reason. Many people who suffer from depression do everything possible to hide from others what they consider their main weakness.
They try not to talk about past traumas
In any social setting, the last thing your loved one suffering from depression wants is to show their emotions. Since he feels so many things with incredible intensity, most of the time he finds it best to hide all these feelings inside and maintain some kind of control over them, instead of letting them out.
Their physical attraction to a partner plummets
If your partner becomes less and less attracted to relationships in bed, this is a very common symptom of depression. On the other hand, your partner may be trying to overcompensate in this area by trying to get close more aggressively, to a level that is not typical of your relationship.
They keep coming up with excuses
When a person tries to hide his depression and is asked directly about his strange behavior, he very quickly becomes a pro at making excuses. As a result, their constant cancellations of plans and excuses for other strange behaviors take a toll on them. And you need to try to notice these attempts to hide problems as soon as possible and understand what your loved one is really going through.
It is always important for a woman to determine whether a man really loves her. The further development of relations and behavior of a woman depends on this.
If she is confident in the love of a man, she feels happy. If a woman is not sure about this, then she will inevitably experience constant stress.
How to understand the psychology of a man in love
The manifestations of love between men and women differ significantly. For example, women, in order to be sure that they are loved, need to regularly hear confessions from their chosen one. Men often do not repeat the words once said.
A man chooses his object of love and proves his feelings by actions. Experts also distinguish between five love languages: physical, auditory, gifts, time and service. Other experts emphasize that men do not tend to voice their feelings and emotions, but they will always listen to your wishes. In any case, a woman needs to learn to understand exactly how a man expresses his love.
How to understand a man's love through touch
Touch is the easiest way for a man to express his love. This method does not require effort and cost, but at the same time, touch is a very "speaking" sign of love in the eyes of a woman. A man who loves you will regularly touch your hands, hair, neck. These gestures in a loving man are natural. He will touch you not only when it is required by the rules of courtesy or circumstances.
How to understand a man's love by hugs
The embrace of a loving man is never casual. Men embrace their chosen one with awe and love. In the arms of a loving man, you should be comfortable and warm.
Through hugs, men sometimes convey those feelings that they cannot voice in words. Listen to how you feel when a man hugs you.
A hug is a manifestation of concern for you, for your feminine essence and a sense of security. A mature man takes relationships seriously and understands that hugs are a reason for a woman to assume that she claims to be the only one.
How to understand that a man suffers from love
A man can suffer from love in two cases: when he resists it and when he feels that you do not open yourself to him.
In the first case, a man must decide on the further development of relations, and you can only behave like a self-respecting woman: always be irresistible and affectionate, but do not let a man get too close to you until he makes you understand that his decision to be with you.
In the second case, the suffering of a man will be noticeable at first sight: he will look after you and seek you, but with your cold attitude, the man will be drooping and, perhaps, even irritated. Anger is another manifestation of suffering.
How to understand a man is in love or passion
You can understand that a man is deeply devoted to you and loves you in two main ways.
His feelings are always reflected in his behavior. If a man assures you of his love, but at the same time you do not feel his help and care, then you should think about the veracity of his words.
A loving man will never allow you to doubt him. He will not give you reasons for jealousy, he will always be honest with you. Ask yourself the question "What is he doing for me?".
A loving man will always share everything he has with you.
A man is always ready to share his resources with the woman he loves. And this is not only about the material component. A man's resources are his time, energy, sense of humor, creativity, friends, social connections, achievements.
A loving man will regularly invite you to spend time with his friends, make you the main guest of his house and give you the right to dispose of everything that is in it.
At the same time, admiration for you is one of the signs of mature love. A loving man realizes the value of your relationship. He does not forget to emphasize your strengths, thank you for your attention and efforts.
Ask yourself questions: “How does he behave with me?”, “Does he come to the rescue when I need it?”, “Is he ready to invest effort and material resources in the development of our relationship?”.
If you are suffering for a man who has left you, you first of all need to understand and distinguish between natural suffering caused by a meeting with loss and betrayal, and prolonged suffering, which is already an unhealthy reaction to what happened.
Sometimes a woman, after a month of her experiences, begins to feel that the suffering has dragged on too long and it is high time to forget the man and start living.
To suffer and experience the pain of loss is natural. The betrayal and departure of a man is a small death and must be experienced.
This is always a tragic event, which is accompanied by pain, disappointment, loss of trust, a feeling that you have been betrayed, humiliated, acted unfairly, left, rejected. And what can we say about hurt pride and pride!
It is especially difficult to experience all this when a woman is no longer so young.
For many women, the question is:
"How to live on?",
"How to deal with loss?"
"How to deal with pain?",
“How not to run after him and ask him to come back?”
And, in the end, how to believe that life has not ended, that new meetings and new love are possible?
Very often, a woman lacks simple knowledge about the natural stages of experiencing loss. She does not know how to continue to live, how to behave.
There are 5 stages of experiencing the loss of a loved one.
Stage 1. Denial.
“It could have happened to anyone but me!”
You have heard similar stories but find it hard to believe that this has happened to you.
The fear of separation and the upcoming loneliness is so frightening that you do not understand how to live on.
Stage 2. Anger.
“How could he do this to me!
I didn't deserve this! ”
Sadness turns into rage, and you yourself are sometimes frightened by the strength of your hatred for him. From resentment and bitterness, injustice and humiliation, you feel helpless and very angry.
Stage 3. Activity.
You start thinking: “What if…?”
The possibility of getting rid of pain and changing a terrible situation causes a surge of energy. You become creative. And by any means looking for opportunities to restore relationships.
Some at this moment come to a psychologist with a request to return her husband. Others begin to negotiate with God or the Universe, promising anything if the relationship is restored. Still others turn to all possible fortune-tellers and clairvoyants.
But all actions are in vain. Nothing changed.
Stage 4. Depression, loneliness.
After the rise in energy and emotional outburst, there comes a deeper disappointment and a strong energy decline.
A deep sense of loss, loneliness, sadness and general world-weariness are what a woman feels at this stage. In the morning, she hardly gets up to go to work or do household chores.
Classical signs of depression appear: lack of appetite, sometimes unwillingness to see anyone and communicate with someone, tears, insomnia, or, conversely, constant drowsiness.
Stage 5. Acceptance and desire to get out of this state. Journey inside yourself.
A strong desire to heal leads you to deep work above oneself.
You start to analyze your relationships, your life, yourself. A natural question arises: “Why did all this happen to me?”
You begin to look for ways to heal spiritual wounds, let go of the past and forgive everyone, reconnect with your self and find peace in your soul.
This is the final step that allows you to move on from divorce to a new happy life.
And I also want to tell you: do not pay attention to the words of acquaintances who advise you to shake yourself up and spit on everything.
It is very important for you to just go through all the stages of your grief.
Remember: "the night is always dark before the dawn."
At all these stages, it is very important that there are people nearby who are ready to support and understand you. It is important that there is a person who will help you understand and realize everything that happened, and then go through all the difficulties of this period.
Who will it be? A close friend, mother, spiritual teacher, psychologist - it doesn't matter. The main thing is to feel that you are not alone with your suffering.
The experience of grief and acute condition, as a rule, lasts a year.
It takes about three years to fully recover from pain.
If your suffering has dragged on, then it's time to think.
If you suffer for a LONG time over a man who has left you, you cannot let him go, accept the situation, this means only one thing - you have become too dependent on him. And getting out of any is not easy.
Addiction condemns you to suffering, you do not know how to be happy and live easily, you have not had a long experience of happy and deep relationships.
Deep down, you feel that there is another life, that you can live differently ... But for some reason you think that it is not for you.
It's like being at a table full of delicious meals and dare not touch any of them.
If you suffer for a long time over a man who has left you, then for you love is associated with suffering, and while you are thinking about him while suffering, you retain virtual love for a man, creating the illusion of his presence in your life. You continue to be in a relationship with him, although in reality they are not.
To stop suffering means to part with him forever, and this very thought is unbearable for you.
You'd rather suffer. Dependence makes it impossible to part in the soul.
So on a subtle plane you create the illusion of your relationship with him. You are not alone, you are alone with your suffering and pain. And if you suddenly stop feeding your suffering and free yourself from it, what will you have left?
Nothing.
You are seized with fear at the thought of this, because you do not know how to live differently. The thought of a real breakup threatens your sense of security. Complete emptiness and loneliness scares to death.
One of my clients, who for years could not forget her husband, who had gone to another woman, during our meetings, she remembered how every time she was a child she hoped and waited for another man to leave her mother’s life.
He left, and my mother emotionally returned to her until the next novel. And with a man, she continued to hope that he would not be able to live with another woman, that he would realize how much he loved her and return. The thought that he no longer loves is not digested.
Hope dies very long and painfully in two cases. Either in childhood, the emotional pain of deprivation was too strong, or, nevertheless, emotional coldness was replaced by love. You can wait indefinitely, and only when you realize that you cannot influence the situation and a miracle will not happen, you will be able to get in touch with your real grief.
Hopelessness is when you stand on the grave of a loved one on the 40th day and understand that he is no more and will NEVER be.
At this moment, you discover a huge gaping emptiness and wound in yourself. After the death of a person, awareness of the loss comes on the 40th day. What if the person is alive? Hope will live for a very long time, hiding in the corner of your heart, gradually destroying you and depriving you of the opportunity to be happy.
Another client of mine described a similar situation with her father: her mother emotionally moved away from her when she reconciled with her father, and vice versa, she moved closer to her daughter after another quarrel with him.
In the life of an adult woman, a similar scenario occurs: a man left for another woman, but she cannot believe that this is forever, she is waiting for the moment when he will return to her again. The fact is that if you suffer for a long time, then perhaps for you love is associated with suffering.
Most likely, your relationship with a man was not joyful, in your heart you were unhappy and did not feel happy with him. You had many complaints about him, perhaps you considered him unworthy of yourself. Next to him, you had reasons to suffer, a man could not make you completely happy.
You always lacked something in a relationship, it always seemed to you that a man does not love you enough, does not pay enough attention to you.
With him you did not feel happy, maybe you dreamed of life without him, and when he left, it did not bring you joy.
Strange paradox, isn't it?
If you suffer for too long because of the man who left you, this means that according to your scenario, you cannot be happy.
You aspire to life in a palace, but once you get there, you will feel unworthy of living in such a beautiful place. Or, on the contrary, you will think that you deserve better.
If you suffer from a man who has left you, if your condition has dragged on for a long time, this means only one thing - you are dependent on the presence of another person in your life, you do not love yourself, you are not interested in being alone with yourself, you only need Him to feel happy. So, it's time to start looking for yourself. Realize yourself without a man.
You need to realize the full power of the influence of addiction on your real life.
The difficulty lies in the fact that the man continues to feed your hope with his behavior, or you yourself are trying to find food for it. Dependent relationships cause suffering to both, until one shows determination and goes for a real break.
The heart of an addict is soft and it is difficult for him to hurt by taking a firm stand. In parting, pity plays a bad role. And very often a woman takes a good friendly attitude for signs of love.
Many women spend countless years on their fantasies and desires. Your feelings are similar to the feelings of children in orphanage who spend their days standing at the window waiting for their mother. In every woman they see their mother, at night they do not let go of a soft toy, hugging her and talking to her, imagining that they are talking to their mother, who will always be with them.
Your reaction is similar to the reaction of a small child who cannot refuse and forget his mother, cannot believe that his mother left him because she does not need him.
The child feels that he has been abandoned, abandoned. To remain alone, small, in such big world- very scary.
Mom gives not only love, but also a sense of security. And with her departure, everything collapses, the most important thing suffers - a sense of SECURITY.
If your suffering over the man who left you dragged on, you must understand that the man has nothing to do with it - with his departure, your childhood pain and childhood suffering wakes up.
All the feelings that you live are not new to you. They are familiar to you.
You just don't remember them.
They were stored in the depths of your unconscious, and now parting with a man has awakened them. Sometimes the pain that comes into your life makes you wake up for the first time and feel that you are alive, not dead. By understanding the patterns and living your pain bit by bit, you can begin to live differently.
Your life is in your hands, and only you decide how you live.
"
It can be said for sure that the behavior, as well as the actions of a man in love, are significantly different from the behavior of men and guys who are indifferent to this bright feeling.
There are some behavioral indicators of a man in love. For example, trembling in the body when he sees his object of adoration. This tremor cannot be overcome. In addition, the lover is given out by "burning" eyes. It is the sparkle in the eyes that indicates that a person is currently experiencing the happiest moments of his life. Sometimes the behavior and actions of a person in love is characterized by a running and downcast look. This is due to the fact that a man suffers from unrequited love.
A man in love is literally blown up from the inside by the most incredible feelings.
Some even wake up to real creative inspiration. If he was not previously observed writing poetry or singing songs, now he literally gushes with love odes or plays the guitar for his beloved every day. And it's not scary that most often his poems do not rhyme or the song leaves much to be desired. The main man does everything diligently and with soul.
In addition to behavior, the actions of a man in love change dramatically. Now he imitates his beloved in everything. If a girl loves to watch TV shows, then the guy forces himself to sit and watch these movies with his girlfriend. If he loves cosmetics and often does makeup, then a man, in order to get the favor of his beloved, gives her various cosmetic things.
How can a man in love behave? He can not sleep at night, dreams of his beloved and reciprocity. Of course, being in love is a pleasant feeling. However, constant insomnia is the result of fatigue and sleepiness during the day. The lover is ready to do everything for his beloved girl. He wants to spend as much time as possible with his girlfriend, and not with friends. Friends start teasing him.
A man in love begins to call all women by only one name - his beloved.
Of course, women and girls will certainly be angry with him, but he does not care about that. In the mornings, he can be seen "flying" on the wings of love to work or study. He enjoys every little thing and smiles at everyone. He tries to show all his positive traits and show your abilities to surprise your beloved. A man in love does the most incredible things, for example, he writes in huge letters the name of his girlfriend and declarations of love on the pavement. If financial opportunities allow, a man in love can easily give his beloved the most expensive car or an amazing trip to Bali. You can get a tattoo on your chest with the name of your beloved.
There are many signs that indicate a man is in love.
The first and main such sign is a man's sexual attraction to a particular object. This is considered the first sign that shows a man's sympathy for a girl. At first, a man shows only sympathy, followed by love. In addition to sympathy, a man in love feels spiritual closeness with his partner. He likes to spend more time with his girlfriend. She loves to talk to her and touch her. Shows tenderness, and also does not hide his personal life. These signs indicate that this girl is not just his mistress, but a very dear person to him. By nature, men carefully protect their privacy from outsiders and do not allow interference. However, if he is in love, then he himself begins to talk about his love and gradually reveals the secrets of his own personal life.
If a beloved girl or woman asks, then a man in love can give up any of his habits, for example, refuse to play poker with guys every Friday.
Another sign of a man's love is a manifestation of tenderness and a desire to take care of his beloved. However, a man must be prepared for the fact that he will not receive reciprocity for his tenderness, as well as care. If a man really loves a woman, then he will not allow his beloved to suffer and cry because of his actions and deeds. A lover cannot intentionally offend his girlfriend. Although in the relationship of the two minor conflicts are not ruled out. This is true for all people in love. Women should be careful if a man is rude in a relationship or commits betrayal, this is proof that he is not in love at all, as he claims. In such cases, girls should think about how to build a joint future. However, such relations do not promise anything good.
You can’t constantly quarrel if people in love want to keep their love. A man in love reacts only in the first stages of a relationship to the tears of a woman. Frequent tantrums tire men, he may even decide to leave his beloved woman. It is important to understand that you cannot evaluate a man in love in the first days of a love relationship. Love relationship develop and move from one stage to another. Day after day, lovers will get to know each other, and get used to the changes. Love relationships are not only about romance.
Is it possible to understand whether a man loves a woman or not? Men and women are wired differently. It is easier for a woman to say “I love you! "than a man. Such recognition for a man is a very serious act. A man who openly admits this, tries on the role of a dependent person in advance. If women can calmly accept their addiction, then the man begins to panic. The more persistently the partner presses on him, the more he begins to panic. That is why even the most in love man is in no hurry to confess his love and remains silent. To determine whether a man is in love, you just need to carefully look at him.
Many women do not know how to find out if a man loves them.
And if experienced young ladies who have gone through a lot already know at least the main signs of true male love, then young girls and girls inexperienced in love matters have no idea how to recognize a man’s love, how to distinguish a real feeling from a beautiful lie, they have not yet learned to separate the grains from the tares.
In order to come to the conclusion that a man loves you, it is enough to have in his words and actions only the overwhelming majority of the signs of male love given here. Well, if most of the signs of male behavior do not correspond, then most likely (but again - not a fact, but very, very likely) the man does not really love you, but only plays love cat and mouse, and in this case, the cat is he, and you are assigned the role of a gray and suffering mouse.
Real signs of male love. If a man loves...
If a man loves a woman, he never humiliates her.
If a man loves, then the girl does not need to win his love, respect, you do not need to prove absolutely anything - all the evidence already lives in his heart and you cannot burn them out with red-hot metal.
If a man feels true love for a woman, and does not suffer himself and does not torment his beloved with neurotic illusions, then he will never hit her under any pretext: if he does not hit, then he loves. And this applies not only to physical, but also moral, mental, psychological blows. A loving man does not wound his lady with a dagger in the very heart - he leaves it for her and his enemies.
A loving man always wants a child from his beloved woman.
If a man truly loves, and does not adore himself in his love for a woman, he will take off his last, sell his beloved car, plow at three jobs from dawn to dusk, but will make sure that his beloved is happy and opportunity didn't need anything.
If a man loves a woman, then he makes many sacrifices for her - from refusing to be friends with certain people to agreeing to spend the whole weekend with his dearest and most beloved wife in a tedious run through shopping centers.
If real love lives in a man's heart, then a man forgives his chosen one for any shortcomings, regardless of the degree of their quantity, significance and originality.
If a man loves a woman, he calls her to marry, he wants her to become his official, legal wife, to be together in sorrow and in joy.
If a man really loves a woman, then he tends to spend ALL his free time with her.
When a man feels love for a certain woman, he is not afraid to humiliate himself, look ridiculous in the eyes of his beloved and those around him, he is ready for anything to achieve her reciprocity.
If a man loves, he calls first, and does not harass his beloved without contacting her for days on end.
A loving man does not drive in front of his beloved show-off - next to her he is more humble than the most humble lamb.
It is difficult to say why a particular man loves a particular woman, but usually this love is based on his love for his mother, if this is real love, or on the unavailability of a certain girl for him, if this is not real love, but only a neurotic addiction, called not inherent in her. feeling of love.
If a man loves, he is ready to wait for the first intimacy with his beloved for at least a year - if only she was there, was in his life, did not reject his courtship.
When a man loves, he often gives a woman small or large gifts and gifts - depending on the level of his material income and social status.
If a guy loves, he will spend his only 100 rubles, but he will pervert and take the girl to a cafe, wanting to surprise, please and please her.
When love lives in a man’s heart, it doesn’t stare around at other people’s women in search of new love adventures - he already has everything and he doesn’t need anyone else, no one’s boobs of the tenth size, and no one’s large-sized priests a la Jennifer Popes.
If a man loves, for the sake of his beloved, he will move mountains, make a career, open a business, become famous all over the world.
When a man loves, he says tender words to his beloved, even if he does not know how. Or, at least, he tries to do it, learns the art of beautiful words and compliments, expresses his feelings, if not with words, then with gestures, deeds, gifts, help and support.
A woman can ALWAYS rely on a really loving man - without exceptions and reservations.
In any difficult or doubtful situation, truly loving man ALWAYS take the side of your beloved, even if she is wrong.
If a man’s love for a woman is real, there is no calculation and conditions in it according to the principle “If you don’t do this or that, I will stop loving you”, and according to any other principles, true love also completely lacks calculation and conditions, except perhaps aimed at making the woman she loves even happier.
The real love of a man does not go down to blackmail and bribes.
If a successful man loves a woman, then he does not buy her mutual love, but only tries to make his beloved happy.
If a man loves his woman, he will not humiliate, insult, scold her in the presence of other people.
When a man loves, he doesn't care if he loves a bitch or not.
If a man loves, and does not suffer from a passionate neurotic, but temporary, mental-heart disorder-insanity, he will never cheat on his beloved woman under any pretext: if necessary, he will fight off fans, refuse 1000 and 1 lovely heifer, but remain faithful for the beloved in all her virginal chastity.
If a man loves, he is not interested in his wife's girlfriends, even if they flirt with him.
A sure sign: if a man loves, expect touching SMS messages from him.
A true sign: if a man loves, he will take on part of the household duties, including sometimes washing dishes at the request of his beloved or even without her, sometimes he will clean the house himself, take out the trash, and shop.
A true sign: if a man feels true love for a woman, he will never be ashamed of her, even if she grinds utter nonsense in public.
If a man loves a woman, in one way or another, he will earn money, will work, look for an opportunity to provide his beloved with everything necessary and will never calmly and shamelessly sit on her neck and provide.
When a man loves, he does not hesitate to appear with his woman in public, openly go with her to the cinema, restaurants, to official events, take her to his home, introduce her to his mother, to his friends ... He is not shy and does not look for stupid excuses.
If a man loves, then he loves not with his eyes, but with his heart and with all his soul, therefore the appearance of his beloved is not really important for him - in his heart she will always be the most beautiful and sexy, beautiful lady in the world. Even despite the fact that she is now running around the hut in a cucumber mask and a greasy dressing gown, she is still his beloved woman.
If a man loves, he will never tell her jokingly that "You are so alone - you were, you are and you don't need to anymore."
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